User:Rivermeadfc

Rivermead Football Club

Founded in 2002 this Chelmsford based football club has re-shaped the way football is played at the amateur level. With a strong emphasis on drinking and pestering women, the actual footballing element of the club always takes a back seat. Wives and girlfriends are frowned upon by the crooked selection committee and are viewed as player misconduct, despite this harsh stance a worrying number of the squad still appear to be pairing off with their respective captors.

Gayest team member is currently ginger haired full-back Blair Stanley, who was married on 22nd of July 2006. After a disappointing 05/06 season, which saw the team exit the cup in the semi-finals and throw away a decent title challenge by going on an impromptu team trip to Las Vegas, Rivermead look forward to a successful 06/07 under the guidance of ageing manager Steven 'Monty Burns' Robinson. It is only pure coincidence that Steve "Burns" Robinson and Christopher "Knotty" Knott are picked on a regular basis AND are also permanent members on the notorious Crooked Selection Committee.

Team members can often be found in the East end of Chelmsford town centre, merrily drinking in riverside bars and dancing in the team hot spot "Chicagos". Pre-match routines often involve consumption of take-away; curry spring roll is the cornerstone of any such meal. The watching of videos and DVDs in order to pass the twilight hours is commonplace. "Big Wednesday" is almost up to 50 caps. References are frequently made to "Sharpe" and team tactics are based around the principal of forming square or forming line.