User:RobbyGreg/Wilton culture/CKC29 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

RobbyGreg


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:RobbyGreg/Wilton_culture?veaction=edit&preload=Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Wilton culture

Lead
The article's lead section concisely describes the rest of the content of the article. It does a good job of outlining some of the content in the rest of the article's sections. It builds tremendously upon the original article's lead section, which was very sparse and lacking in information.

Content
The article's content is relevant and up to date. It provides an excellent overview of the background and history of discovery of Wilton lithic technology and cultural packages. In addition to describing the technologies characteristics, the article also outlines dietary changes and demographic shifts during the period. The content is relevant to the article, though some of the information (i.e. function of backed stone tools), may not be necessary. Instead linking to the appropriate article (Microliths, as you have done) is probably sufficient.

Tone and Balance
The article does a good job of maintaining an objective and neutral tone throughout. It mainly describes historical context of site and artifact discovery (i.e. the people who discovered what and when). Whenever the article discusses claims or arguments related to the site, it will use language such as (Researcher X suggest this) rather than stating viewpoints as definite fact.

Sources and References
Pretty well referenced. I recommend citing Pargeter (2007), Lombard and Pargeter (2008), and Pargeter et al. 2022 as references for your discussion of backed tools as weapon inserts. I also recommend adding a few more links referencing other articles, as some terms should use them (i.e. technological complex, lithic technology, rockshelter). Some sentences also do not have citations currently ("Many archaeologists acknowledge that Wilton is not a single culture or identity but, instead, solely reflects general trends over regions of eastern and southern Africa during the past 8,000 years.").

Organization
The article has a good flow and the sections tend to stay organized on the subject matter. Each topic sentence sets up the following information in the paragraph well. Improvements would be to make the sentences more concise and eliminate passive voice.

Images and Media
All of the images are relevant and help illustrate the article's main points to the reader. The artifact and environment photos do a particularly good job of orienting the reader to the contexts from which the artifacts come. I think that the article could benefit from an inclusion of a picture of San hunter-gatherers in the last section.

Suggested Improvements
Overall, this is a very strong first draft discussing Wilton culture. My suggestions are as follows:


 * 1) Add references to some of the unreferenced sentences
 * 2) Add a few more images (i.e. San hunter-gatherers) to try and break up the text a little bit more
 * 3) Make the sentences more concise and eliminate passive voice from the writing
 * 4) I suggested to remove the text on backed tool functionality, but if you decide to keep it, I suggest adding the references from above. In general, I think most descriptions of artifact types and functions do not need to be thorough, and you may instead just link to articles with the detailed descriptions.