User:Rocko Lunchbox/Bassari people/Chloponyart391 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Rocko Lunchbox


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * Editing User:Rocko Lunchbox/Bassari people - Wikipedia


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Bassari people - Wikipedia

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

The lead was updated to contain more specific information. I think the lead should also contain something about their language, religion and their art. The lead does a good job of stating the topic but it does not cover all the sections of the article within it. The lead is concise, even a bit too short.

The content is up to date and relevant to the topic. The Fonio festival content could be its own subsection. It is in depth while the other content is more generalized.

I think that a more in depth explanation of how mathematics functions within their artistic traditions as well as how it functions within society. Expand upon the divination rites within the religion section. I would also like to see a pre-colonial history and a history of colonialism included. The precolonial mathematics was mentioned so the pre-colonial society should be expanded upon.

The tone of the article remains neutral and unbiased. I think that a historical point of view is underrepresented. There is no content that is swaying the reader, it remains very factual.

Most sources used are reliable and scholarly. I was able to access Eglash, Ron (1995). "Scaling hexagons in a Bassari Initiation Mask". The Mathematics Teacher. National Council of Teachers of Mathematics. The information was present there. However, it needs to be expanded upon more.

Some websites used do not seem entirely reliable. I would look elsewhere for this information. Particularly reference 12. The other sources looked to be reliable.

The content is well written. It is a bit difficult to understand the artistic traditions without pictures however I think that once images are added it will be much clearer. The content could have more sections and subsections that go in greater depth especially within the art section because it seems to be expansive. There could be subsections about masquerades and then another for other traditions.

The article is much more complete than the original! The art section is particularly strong. I would like to see more written about how the artistic tradition ties to religion and the overall beliefs of society but so far that section is very strong. Adding more historical context to the article would be very helpful. I think that would improve my overall understanding of the Bassari people.

Good job!