User:Ryan the Usurper

Ryan the Usurper is, basically, the best. His ego is currently 117,891 miles by 117,891 miles wide. (That's 188 km x 188 km if you spell things with a u) He is currently around 5.926737e-17th of a parsec tall. He speaks Esperanto, Latin, Elvish, 1337, English, Spanish, Malay, and Sdrawkcab. He once usurped Chuck Norris. His chin curtain (which was transplanted from C. Everett Koop's face to his) is much better than Abe Lincoln's.

List of people Ryan the Usurper made cry

 * Chuck Palahniuk, after loosing in a gross-out contest.
 * Clara Peller, after the Usurper found the beef
 * ZZ Top, after seeing his ultimate chin curtain.