User:SM Fan/List of Stephanie Miller Show bits and gags



The Stephanie Miller Show, a liberal talk radio show featuring host Stephanie Miller, voice artist Jim Ward, and engineer/producer Chris Lavoie, incorporates a variety of recurring comedic elements.

Impressions
Impressions of political figures, media personalities, and celebrities are used throughout the show. Ward performs most of the impressions, though Miller includes a few of her own. Some imitations are nearly indistinguishable from the subject, while others are zany parodies highlighting a particular aspect of the subject's personality. Frequent targets of impressions include:


 * Wolf Blitzer: Blitzer is depicted as extremely constipated based on a supposed diet of hard cheese and drywall, sometimes followed by an explosion sound effect. The impression may be used in conjunction with the similar Rita Cosby impression, with Miller and Ward sometimes imitating a hypothetical passionate liaison between the two.


 * Tom Brokaw: Ward's impersonations of the former NBC newsanchor features an exaggerated elongation of "L" sounds in words, and, subsequently, all the stories that "Tom Brokaw" reports have a liberal use of the letter L (Slobodan Milošević, Jalalabad, etc.). When Harry Shearer calls in, Miller gets Ward to compete with Shearer for the best Brokaw impersonation.


 * George W. Bush: Ward's impression exaggerates the long pauses and prolific use of "uh" or "er" (hence, "President Dial Tone"), and is often punctuated with rhetoric such as "Freedom's on the march" or "Smoke 'em out". Sometimes the sound of riding a bicycle and a ringing bike bell play during the impression, in reference to one of Bush's frequent exercise activities. Another running gag is the character's use of the non-sequitor "I like toast". When President Bush delivers a speech that is carried live on network television, the show broadcasts the speech with side comments by Miller and Ward and occasional sound effects in a style similar to Mystery Science Theater 3000. Ward's imitation of President Bush is so accurate that listeners have complained that they cannot distinguish which words are said by the president and which are said by Ward.


 * Dick Cheney: For Cheney, Ward talks into a coffee cup and imitates Darth Vader while the Imperial March theme from Star Wars plays in the background. The impression almost always ends with so-called "Dick Vader" suggesting that those who do not like what he says "can go themselves with" some random object in Star Wars canon (examples range from lightsabers to the planet Hoth). The quote refers to a 2004 remark that Cheney made to Senator Patrick Leahy.


 * Bill Clinton: Ward's impression usually includes some sexual suggestiveness (in reference to the Lewinsky scandal and other alleged affairs), which ends with a sound effect representing Hillary hitting Bill with a frying pan.


 * Hillary Clinton: Miller's impression is reminiscent of the martians from the Mars Attacks! movie, featuring a nasal, high-pitched squawking sound. Originally, the entire impression consisted of only squawks, but now includes words highlighting what Miller calls "Hillary's flat 'a'" pronunciation. With the start of Hillary's presidential campaign, her frying pan (see Bill Clinton's entry above) has been used against other people besides Bill.


 * Alan Colmes: Ward's impression lambastes the liberal pundit from Fox News' Hannity and Colmes by making him sound like Milton Waddams from Office Space due to his timidity.


 * Rita Cosby: Both Miller and Ward perform a similar characterization of the MSNBC reporter. Miller sometimes apologizes for this impression, which exaggerates Cosby's husky voice, because Miller hopes that her voice is only a temporary effect after being "hit in the throat by a dodgeball". After the death of Anna Nicole Smith, the impression included a loud helicopter sound effect, referencing her penchant for reporting from them.


 * Tom Cruise: Ward talks very fast to background sounds of springs being released, in reference to Cruise jumping on the couch on the The Oprah Winfrey Show. Scientology and Katie Holmes are recurring themes. The impression usually ends with insane laughter accompanied by a cuckoo clock.


 * Mark Foley: Performed by Ward as an exact Snagglepuss imitation, backed by the cartoon show's theme music.


 * Bill Gates: Ward performs the technology mogul as a stereotypical computer geek, using references to Star Trek, Star Wars, Battlestar Galactica, "Dungeons and Dragons", and others. The impression is nasal, lispy, and usually giggly.


 * Newt Gingrich: Ward performs Gingrich with a decidedly "Kermit the Frog" cadence and flair. Miller speculated that Newt is "paid by the 'frankly'".


 * Alberto Gonzales: Ward's impersonation is reminiscient of Mr. Rogers making blatant threats against those listening to him, while horror-themed sound effects play in the background. Lavoie and Miller have stated that they are scared by this character.


 * Sean Hannity: In reference to his claim that Ray Nagin left hundreds of buses unused during Hurricane Katrina, Ward impersonates Hannity making a heartfelt plea involving: "The buses... why?" This is always accompanied by the flute ballad from Terms of Endearment that has become Hannity's leitmotif on the show. At times, Ward resorts to a "talking point frittata", where he randomly spouts Hannity's often-used talking points.


 * Dennis Hastert/James Sensenbrenner: Ward impersonates these two Congressmen with a heavy Midwestern accent, rife with references to meats followed by a "Lipitor chaser" when their blood "gets all chunky". Their catchphrase is "Oh God" pronounced "Oh Gadd!". The two characters have only been heard together once, and remain difficult to distinguish from each other.


 * Arianna Huffington: Miller's impression of the progressive columnist and owner of The Huffington Post blog exaggerates her accent so what she says is unintelligible. The style is reminiscient of Eva Gabor (the Green Acres theme sometimes plays in the background). Occasionally, Miller and Ward perform a hypothetical round table discussion between Huffington, Ozzy Osbourne, Keith Richards, and Arnold Schwarzenegger, all of which are done in exaggerated accents which are nearly unintelligible.


 * Kim Jong-Il: For the North Korean dictator, Ward uses an exaggerated Korean accent with a stereotypical Asian speech pattern (transposing L's and R's). He is depicted as a parody of hip hop culture, using the appropriate slang such as "K-to-the-J-to-the-I-L in the hizzie!" (or sometimes "hizzouse"). The political incorrectness of this impression is a point of exasperation for Lavoie, who says "Oh no" when Miller sets up Ward for the character.


 * Joe Lieberman: Ward's impression is reminiscient of the Willie Tanner character from the 1980's sitcom ALF, and often includes references from that show.


 * Rush Limbaugh: Usually performed by Miller, the impersonation features a lot of loud breathing into the microphone and the phrase "my friends" after almost every sentence. It is accompanied by the shaking of a pill bottle and shuffling of paper.


 * Chris Matthews: Ward responds "Fair enough, hah!" in the MSNBC host's voice, reflecting a reluctance to challenge blatant lies told by guests. More recently, though, Ward's Matthews questions those lies with an exasperated, "NOT fair enough!"


 * Bill O'Reilly: The content of Ward's Bill O'Reilly impression often reflects tidbits from his sexual harassment lawsuit.
 * Typical O'Reilly Fan: Ward based this impression on Billy Bob Thornton's Karl Childers character in the movie Sling Blade, using a strong stereotypical Southern accent. The character always agrees will Bill O'Reilly and usually references "biscuits and mustard". Sometimes the character has a back-and-forth dialogue with an O'Reilly sound bite consisting of "A'right then." "All right." "A'right then." "All right." "A'right then." The character also uses the phrase "Get'er done" as popularized by Larry the Cable Guy.


 * Ozzy Osbourne: Ward impersonates Osbourne using a mumbling, breathy, unintelligible voice.


 * Randi Rhodes: This Miller impersonation of the Air America Radio host lampoons the host's measured "time checks" after a heated, breathless rant.


 * Keith Richards: Another Ward impression consisting of unintelligible mumblings.


 * Geraldo Rivera: This impression usually occurs during "Right Wing World" after playing a clip of dialogue between Bill O'Reilly and Geraldo. Ward then continues the subject into blatantly homosexual territory, using a stereotypical lisp accompanied by the Village People's "In the Navy." During these impersonations, Ward sometimes delves into masochism with Rivera complaining that O'Reilly won't stop (accompanied by the sound of a whip cracking) even after Rivera shouts the safeword, "Mizrahi!"


 * Pat Robertson: Accompanied by organ music, Ward exaggerates Robertsons' chuckling, with frequent threats to various groups (liberals, feminists, homosexuals, etc.) of being "tossed into the lake of fire" and/or being subjected to various diseases. The character gets more and more chuckly and giggly as his rant progresses.


 * Donald Rumsfeld: Ward exaggerates Rumsfeld's penchant for answering his own rhetorical questions, and use of outdated slang such as "heavens to Betsy" or "my stars". More recently, Ward highlights that his voice is "getting higher and higher" whenever Rumsfeld fervently defends a position.


 * Arnold Schwarzenegger: The most understandable of the "unintelligible" impressions, Ward uses an exaggerated Austrian accent and ends his sentences with "...and these kinds of things" or "...and things of this nature". Miller sometimes asks "Exactly, what kinds of things?"

Nicknames
Miller applies nicknames and mock titles to make fun of certain media and political figures, which include:


 * Mahmoud Ahmadinejad: "Mahmoud I'm a Dinner Jacket" (or sometimes simply "I'm a Dinner Jacket"). Ward notes that this deliberate mispronunciation originated with comedian and fellow voice actor, Harry Shearer, who uses it on his weekly public radio program Le Show.


 * Michele Bachmann: "Bat Crazy Congresswoman". This nickname was originally used for Katherine Harris.


 * John Boehner: "The Boner". According to Miller, "Boner" is the correct pronunciation based on the mnemonic saying, "When two vowels go walking, the first one does the talking."


 * Michael Brown: "Noted Arabian horse expert" (in reference to the job he held prior to working at FEMA).


 * George W. Bush: Miller rarely uses a nickname for President Bush, though callers and e-mailers sometimes do. The nickname "Chimpy McCokespoon" was occasionally used, referring to his appearance and to the allegation that Bush was arrested for possession of cocaine.


 * Tucker Carlson: Miller makes fun of Carlson's tersely titled cable show Tucker by adding "exclamation point" after mentioning the show. After Carlson's appearance on Dancing with the Stars, Miller appended two phrases related to choreography, "jazz hands" and "spirit fingers". Thus, the show is now referred to as "Tucker, exclamation point, jazz hands, spirit fingers".


 * Dick Cheney: "Dick Vader" (usually in conjunction with Ward's Darth Vader-style impression). Alternatively, "Creepy McCrookedmouth" (in reference to his symptoms of Bell's palsy) or "Blasty McBirdshot" (following the Dick Cheney hunting incident).


 * Michael Chertoff: "Skeletor" (in reference to his emaciated look that is similar to the cartoon character Skeletor). Sometimes "Skeletor" is also used for Alan Colmes for a similar reason.


 * Ann Coulter: Currently nicknamed "Noted Incubus/Succubus" but originally, "noted transsexual plagiarist" (in reference to her visible adam's apple and her reported plagiarism ), "junk-toting stick figure" and "noted female impersonator". Miller switched from using those nicknames to avoid offending transsexuals. When talking about Ann Coulter, a screeching bird sound effect is used. Occasionally, the very mention of Coulter's name is followed by Mike Myers as Austin Powers saying "It's a MAN, baby!!". In light of Coulter's bigoted comment about John Edwards at the CPAC convention in March 2007, Miller insisted that she be called "Republican Party Spokesperson" Coulter, arguing that Coulter says what many conservative Republicans believe, but are too afraid to say. Another occasional nickname is "Blondie McProstate".


 * Tom DeLay: "Drunky McPukeshoes" (in reference to a couple of his speeches where he slurs some words). He is often "interviewed" at Barfy's Bar & Grill, with the sound of clinking bar glasses and the song "Tequila" heard in the background.


 * Al Edwards: A former Texas state representative nicknamed "Representative Squeezy McFeelpants" (in reference to his support of banning "suggestive clothing" for cheerleaders ). "Squeezy McFeelpants" has become a frequent character on the show and has led to a series of related characters (see ). Interestingly, Edwards is the only Democrat to get a nickname, and his actual name was never used on the show until March 6, 2006. When told of his name and political affiliation, Miller took pride in being an equal opportunity offender.


 * Jerry Falwell: "Reverend Three-Chin".


 * Bill Frist: "Noted cat-killing video doctor" (in reference to his controversial use of cats while he was a medical student and his diagnosis of Terri Schiavo after viewing a video tape). Since his response to Harry Reid's closed session of the Senate, "Frist" has become a synonym for uptightness (i.e. "Panties in a Frist").


 * Jeff Gannon: "Former male hooker and White House reporter".


 * Newt Gingrich: "Human Muppet" (for his similarity in speaking style to Kermit the Frog).


 * Alberto Gonzales: "Torture Czar" or, at other times, "Torquemada" (in reference to the memo where he labeled some of the Geneva Convention provisions as "quaint").


 * Ted Haggard: "The Fabulously Reverend Ted Haggard". Since his "restoration", Miller has referred to him as "The Formerly Fabulous Reverend Ted Haggard", accompanied by a harp flourish.


 * Katherine Harris: Formerly "Bat Crazy Congresswoman". Miller adopted the nickname "Looney McBoobjob", suggested by a listener, in reference to Harris' appearance on the Hannity & Colmes show where she emphasized her bust.


 * Dennis Hastert: "Beefy McBratwurst" (referring to his size and from the meat culture prevalent in the Midwest).


 * Michael Hayden: "General Spy" (in reference him being a General in the United States Air Force and the head of the National Security Agency during the NSA warrantless surveillance controversy).


 * Brit Hume: "Human Shar Pei" (in reference to his droopy facial features).


 * Terry Jeffrey: "Pocket Pundit" (because of his high-pitch voice). Sometimes Miller or Ward will respond to his soundbite in a similar pitch.


 * Rush Limbaugh: "Drug-Addled Gas Bag" (in reference to his abuse of prescription drugs).


 * Scott McClellan: "Puffy McMoonface" (in reference to his puffy cheeks), or alternatively "Chummy McSharkbait" (in reference to journalists taking him to task) or "Presidential Spokesliar" (when he was the White House spokesperson).


 * Ken Mehlman: "Ken Mehlman, played by Hillary Swank".


 * Harriet Miers: "Frau Blücher" (in reference to her similar appearance to the Young Frankenstein character).


 * Dick Morris: "Prostitute toe sucker" (in reference to the story that led to his dismissal from the 1996 Clinton re-election campaign).


 * Andrew Napolitano: "Judge No Forehead".


 * Robert Novak: "Squealy McTraitorpants" (in reference to his role in the Valerie Plame scandal).


 * Lisa Nowak: "Spacey McPeepants" (in reference to her being an astronaut who used an adult diaper during a 900 mile trip to persue a romantic rival).


 * Bill O'Reilly: "Megalomaniacal phone-sex enthusiast" (in reference to the Andrea Mackris incident).


 * Vladimir Putin: "Pooty-Poot", from President Bush's nickname for the Russian President.


 * John Roberts: Called "The Manchurian Candidate" prior to his confirmation as Chief Justice of the United States by the Senate (the news of his confirmation broke while the show was broadcasting live, to which Miller commented "good, who needs all those rights anyway?"). His son was nicknamed "Dancey McSaddleshoes" (in reference to his dancing during the news conference where President Bush's introduced his father).


 * Pat Robertson: "Evil Uncle Chuckles" (from his chuckling, as exaggerated in Ward's impression).


 * Karl Rove: "Tubby McTreason" (in reference to his role in the Valerie Plame scandal).


 * Rick Santorum: "Senator Man-on-Dog" (in reference to a statement he made at an interview ).


 * Antonin Scalia: "Anton 'flip the bird' Scalia" (in reference to an obscene gesture he made ).


 * Jean Schmidt: "The Schmidthead from Ohio" (after making inappropriate comments about Congressman John Murtha).


 * Tony Snow: After receiving suggested nicknames from listeners, Miller settled on "Crony McSnowjob" for the new "Presidential Spokesliar". Other proposed nicknames included: "Snowy McFoxtrot", "Phony McSnowjob", "Foxy McHenhouse", and "Baloney McSnowjob".


 * Dana Perino: Spokesliar for George W. Bush, often called "Lying Sack of Cute" or "Tiny Dancer of Deception."

Vocabulary
Miller's speaking style incorporates many offbeat words and expressions, including:


 * -berries: A suffix used to describe copious amounts of something; for example, "Freedom's on the march, now with extra freedom-berries!"
 * Captain Obvious: A nickname used for someone when they say something that should be obvious.
 * Celebutard: A portmanteau of "celebutante" (itself a portmanteau of "celebrity" and "debutante") and "retard". This nickname is applied to celebrities who do bad (or stupid) things.  People acquiring celebutard status include Britney Spears and Paris Hilton.
 * Conspiracy Snausage: A tidbit of information relating to a conspiracy theory, in reference to the show's "Conspiracy Corner" segment.
 * The Deliverance Wing of the Republican Party: The far right of the Republican Party, especially on social issues (usually accompanied by "Dueling Banjos").
 * Extra Crispy Bucket of ...: Indicates something extraordinary, in reference to Kentucky Fried Chicken's menu and packaging. Usually followed by the word "Republicans" to refer to the ultra-conservative Republicans.
 * Flaven(s): A nonsense word used in various contexts, from the style of a Jerry Lewis comedy routine where he would begin to blurt out gibberish. There has been debate on the show about whether or not the word was actually used by Lewis, or if it has come into use from Lewis-inspired characters such as Professor Frink on The Simpsons. The word was included in the list of mock side effects caused by listening to the show, which ranged from benign ("heebie-jeebies") to the fanciful ("Steinberg-Flaven").
 * Fox Question: A question that is so loaded, to bias the answer (an alleged technique of some Fox News hosts).
 * Foxpert: A person who is not an unbiased expert but is treated as one on the Fox News Channel.
 * Frittata: A conglomeration, especially an awkward attempt to combine individual talking points into one argument.
 * Fun Facts: Usually: a summary of an appalling situation.  Less often:  useless, but interesting, trivia.
 * Hello, Ripley's: Applied to a story that might be taken as surprising or unexpected, but isn't.
 * Jihad Boots: A ridicule that the only preparation that the Miami Seven did for their alleged plan to blow up the Sears Tower was to buy boots.
 * (Lovely) Lady Lumps: Breasts, from the Black Eyed Peas song "My Humps".
 * Mooks: The mildly derogatory term Miller uses to collectively refer to Ward and Lavoie.
 * Nambibia: Variation of Namibia. Sometimes, Miller would "mistakenly" say "NAMBLA" instead. The term was used in reference to the "Brangelina" baby, whose middle name according to Miller ("because she was named by the 'Governor' of Namibia") is a bunch of random clicks reminiscent of the Khoisan languages spoken in the country.
 * Participation Ribbon/Tee-Ball Trophy: These are imaginary awards given to callers for their attempts at humor. Slightly funny jokes get a Participation Ribbon, while better jokes get a Tee-Ball Trophy. Some callers get both if their humor is extraordinary.
 * Pillsbury Shi'a Crescent Rolls: A play on the phrase "Shi'a crescent" that pundits applied to the Shi'a dominance over a large area of the Middle East.
 * Political crazy car: Applied to politicians and pundits whose opinions shift frequently between liberal and conservative. Most commonly used with Chris Matthews, but also recently with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
 * Scooby-Doo Moment: The confusion caused by realizing that something being said does not make sense, as expressed by Scooby-Doo's often-used exclamation, "Huh?!"
 * Snarf: To expel various liquids through nose, caused by laughing hard while drinking, as reported by the show's listeners.
 * Speculatate: A variation of the word "speculate". It has other variants such as "speculatation" and "speculatated".
 * Springtime for Hitler Face: As in The Producers, a '"Springtime for Hitler" face is a look of shock, disgust, or surprise over something repugnant, usually associated with wide eyes, open mouths, and being pushed back in your chair.
 * Stupid O'Clock/Insane O'Clock: The early hours that the show's hosts must go to bed and get up, due to the show starting at 6 AM local time.
 * Wargasm: Used to describe apparent giddiness by some conservatives over the prospect of war.
 * What the Fox?!: A reference to presentations on, journalistsic standards of, or comparisons to, Fox News. As an example, an unbelievably bad piece of reporting might be accompanied by the phrase "What the Fox?!"

Sound effects
A distinctive feature of the show is the prolific use of sound effects intermixed with the discussion. Some of these are typical sounds (buzzer, bell, phone ringing, etc.), but many are short clips of dialogue or music from various sources.

The Liar Cannon
Lavoie has collected many clips with quotes about lying, which are played in response to a presumed lie. When the lie is blatant enough to deserve multiple clips, the combination is referred to as the "Liar Cannon". Selections include:
 * "Are you lying then or are you lying now? Or, are you not, in fact, a chronic and habitual liar?!" (Sir Wilfrid Robarts in Witness for the Prosecution)
 * "How does it feel to be a liar? With pants constantly on fire?" (The Monarch in The Venture Brothers)
 * "I have simply made the logical deduction that you are a liar." (Spock from Star Trek)
 * "Liar! Liar!  Liiiiiarrrr!" (Valerie in The Princess Bride)
 * "Liar, liar, pants on... whoa!" (from Beavis and Butthead)
 * "Lies! It's like you have to lie to live. You're a lie-a-betic! You have lie-a-betes! Twice a day, you have to take a shot of Inso-lie-ne!" (Stan Smith from American Dad!)
 * "Look, you know how these people lie! It's born in them! I mean what the heck, I don't have to tell you. They don't know what the truth is!" (Juror #10 in 12 Angry Men)
 * "...the lying, the covering up...I will not stand for it! I can't stand it. I really can't!" (Beth Jarrett in Ordinary People)
 * "We become tired of hearing people lie." (Frank Galvin in The Verdict)
 * "You're a Lying Sack of Crap": This jingle is used whenever someone is caught in a lie. The jingle has also been remade by listeners in many musical styles, including a waltz and a patriotic march, with the remakes always including some rendition of the sound "plink, plink!" heard at the end of the original.

Movie and TV clips
Single quote sources:
 * "Be quiet, you eediot!" (Ren from Ren and Stimpy)
 * "Computer says 'no'"/"Computer says 'yes'" (Carol Beer from the BBC show Little Britain).
 * Fake orgasm (Sally in When Harry Met Sally...)
 * "Get...those...puppies!" (Cruella de Vil in 101 Dalmatians, played when talking about Congresswoman Katherine Harris)
 * "Ha ha ha ha, it's a little joke!" (Arthur in Arthur)
 * "I am a lady. If you say I'm not, I'll bop you." (Cindy Brady from The Brady Bunch, played in reference to Miller)
 * "I just hate you, and I hate your ass face." (Corky St. Clair in Waiting for Guffman)
 * "I just think I'm gonna barf!" (Marge in Fargo)
 * "Nice beaver!" "Thanks, I just had it stuffed." (Frank and Jane in The Naked Gun)
 * "No, no. Don't speak. Don't speak. Silence. Silence! Don't speak!" (Helen to David in Bullets Over Broadway)
 * "No! No, Stefania! Noooo!" (from the 1984 TV movie, Nadia, about the life of Romanian gymnast Nadia Comaneci, played when Lavoie needs to admonish Miller)
 * "Oh, oh, OOOOOHHHH!" (Sam Kinison's trademark scream)
 * The Three Stooges fighting
 * "What?" (unidentified stoner girl in Heathers)
 * "You're going the wrong way!" (a scene from Planes, Trains & Automobiles)

Multiple quote sources:
 * Death Becomes Her
 * "Could you just not breathe?" (Madeline)
 * "En garde, bitch!" (Helen, played whenever Miller and a female guest or caller tries to take one of Miller's "Future Husbands")
 * "You should learn not to compete with me. I always win! Hah!" (Madeline)
 * Mommie Dearest
 * "No...wire...hangers...EVER!" (Joan Crawford)
 * "Tina! Bring me the axe." (Joan Crawford)
 * "Why can't you give me the respect that I'm entitled to? Why can't you treat me like I would be treated by any stranger on the street?" "Because, I am NOT one of your FANS!" (Joan Crawford and Christina)
 * Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer
 * "Didn't I ever tell ya about Bumbles?" "Bumbles Bounce!" (mainly used to denote heavy or tall people)
 * "From now on, gang, we won't let Rudolph join in any of our reindeer games!"
 * "I'd like to be... a dentist!"
 * Thump! Thump! Thump! "Looky what he can do!" *ding* "Whoa." (from the scene where the Abominable Snow Monster puts the star on top of the Christmas tree, played to denote a heavy or tall person)
 * "We're a couple of misfits." (played when Miller explains that she is too liberal for conservatives and too politically incorrect for liberals)
 * "Whaa-hoo! Nothin'."
 * Sunset Boulevard (all by Norma Desmond)
 * "All right, Mr. DeMille, I'm ready for my close-up." (often used when referring to Katherine Harris)
 * "I am big. It's the pictures that got small." (often used when referring to Katherine Harris)
 * "Max! Max! Max!" (used in reference to Miller's dog, Max)
 * Trading Spouses (from the episode with Marguerite Perrin, also known as "the Christian Mommy")
 * "Get the hell out of my house -- in Jesus' name, I pray!"
 * "She's dark-sided, too!"
 * "She's not a Christian, no!"

Jingles and song clips

 * "Ain't Nuthin' but a She Thing": A snippet of this Salt-N-Pepa song ("You go, girl! No more sugar and spice And everything nice It ain't a man's world") is played to highlight a notable action or statement by a female.
 * "Baby Got Back": Only the opening quote from the Sir Mix-a-Lot song is used ("Oh... my... God."), to indicate shock at a statement.
 * "Daniel Boone": The opening verse to the TV theme song is edited to replace "Daniel Boone" with "Bill O'Reilly" ("Bill O'Reilly was a man, was a big man ..."), used when Miller thinks Bill O'Reilly displays phony machismo.
 * "Der Fuehrer's Face": The song by Spike Jones is played after particularly odious comments or far-right statements that are viewed as supporting elements of fascism.
 * "Greatest Love of All": The opening lines of this Whitney Houston song ("I believe the children are our future ...") often accompanies mentions of children.
 * "I Know What Boys Like": The line "Nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah ..." from The Waitresses song is used as "Schadenfreude".
 * "Imagine": The intro to the John Lennon song is mixed with quotes by Bush administration officials saying that no one could imagine certain events.
 * "Ironic": The line "Isn't it ironic, don't you think" from the Alanis Morissette song is applied to stories that Miller deems ironic.
 * "Puttin' on the Ritz": The tap dancing segment from Taco Ockerse's version of the song is played when someone has trouble explaining an embarrassing statement or an indefensible position.
 * "Springtime for Hitler": The line "Springtime for Hitler and Germany" from the soundtrack of The Producers is edited to replace "Hitler" and "Germany" with "George Bush" and "Iraq".
 * "We're Not Gonna Take It": The opening verse of the Twisted Sister song (with added announcing and sound effects) is the show's theme and starts each hour of the show.
 * "You are an idiot" : A jingle used after playing a soundbite in which the person says something Miller considers dumb.

Future husbands
Being single, Miller refers to some men whom she likes as her "future husbands". Most of the men on her "future husbands list" have boldly expressed liberal views or disapproval of the Bush Administration. Miller admits that she is very fickle, with a certain person "rocketing up to the top" of her list based on his recent actions. Mentions of her future husbands are often accompanied by a snippet of "Chapel of Love", "He's So Fine", or "I Will Follow Him". The future husbands list includes:


 * Jason Alexander: Actor, after he called the Celebrity Hotline.
 * Rocky Anderson: Mayor of Salt Lake City, after mentioning that President Bush should be impeached at an anti-war rally on March 19 2007.
 * Jack Cafferty: CNN anchor, referred to by Miller as the "crusty old CNN coot".
 * General Wesley Clark: Miller removed Clark from the list (perhaps temporarily) after meeting his wife.
 * George Clooney: Actor, who Miller says has a restraining order against her, from when she climbed onto the chainlink fence surrounding his house to watch him play basketball.
 * Richard Dreyfuss: Actor, after he said George W. Bush should be impeached.
 * Senator Russ Feingold: One of Miller's most frequently mentioned future husbands.
 * Patrick Fitzgerald: Prosecutor in the Plame affair; added when he brought indictments against Scooter Libby, then removed from her list when it was announced that he would not indict Karl Rove, then added back after his news conference following Libby's conviction.
 * David Gregory: NBC News correspondent who asks tough questions during White House press conferences.
 * Paul Hackett: Iraqi War veteran and former candidate for Senate and House seats from Ohio, Miller took Hackett off the list on the November 14 2005 show after meeting his family. However, Hackett is the only "future husband" to have played along with Miller's fantasies, making overt sexual references when he called the show.
 * Dennis Kucinich: US Representative and presidential candidate; when a caller described his Spock-like hair, Miller explained that his politics mattered more to her than his looks.
 * Ben Marble: Gulfport, Mississippi resident who lost his house to Hurricane Katrina and told Dick Cheney during a visit to go f*** himself, repeating what Cheney told Patrick Leahy a year earlier.
 * Bode Miller: Skier, who Miller said had an advantage over the other future husbands because she would not have to change her last name; however, he was dropped after his dismal performance in the 2006 Winter Olympics.
 * John Murtha: Congressman from Pennsylvania and a former Marine who criticized the War in Iraq, but because of his age, Miller is not sure whether he is a suitable "future husband".
 * Gavin Newsom: Mayor of San Francisco, whom Miller called "Mayor McDreamy" after participating in a debate that he moderated.
 * John Nichols: Editor of a Madison, Wisconsin newspaper, for writing an editorial titled "Miller vs. Satan" (in reference to Miller performing a live show in Madison, and Bill O'Reilly saying that people in Madison worship Satan).
 * Keith Olbermann: Host of MSNBC's Countdown, and Miller's original "future husband".
 * Jeff Simon: Reporter for her former hometown newspaper, The Buffalo News, who wrote a positive review about the show.
 * Charles Swift: Navy lawyer who successfully appealed Hamdan v. Rumsfeld to strike down trials of detainees by military commissions.
 * Harry Taylor: Private citizen who criticized George W. Bush in a town hall meeting. Because Taylor presumably lives in Charlotte, North Carolina, where Miller's mother lives, Miller contemplated what it would be like to bring Taylor home to meet her staunchly conservative mother.
 * Steven Weber: Actor, which Miller added on November 17 2006.

However, Miller also notes her attraction to firefighters, which "transcends the political divide". She also likes truck drivers, and takes great pleasure whenever a truck driver calls and agrees to honk the truck's horn.

Self-deprecating humor
Miller uses self-deprecating humor to poke fun at herself quite a bit. Ward and Lavoie often contribute to the bashing, presumably with Miller's approval. Examples include:
 * Although she has no children, Miller often refers to herself as "Mama", as do her listeners.
 * She makes fun of her childhood appearance, including her unibrow, afro, fangs, hammer toe, and gray teeth.
 * Lavoie uses commercial bumpers such as: "She puts the broad back in broadcasting"; "She's the life of the Democratic Party — ignore the lampshade"; "She was abandoned by wolves and raised by Republicans"; "Ex-Catholic girl gone wild".
 * She treats derogatory remarks as compliments, such as when a listener said the show was "sophomoric", or when Lavoie called her a "whore".
 * Lavoie sometimes plays a "She's a slut" soundbite when she talks about one of her "future husbands" in suggestive terms.
 * After a caller named "Reverend Dan" referred to her as a "modern-day Jezebel" and a "happy harlot", she continued to apply the terms to herself.
 * She read on her show, as well as posted on her web site, a humorous, but fact-based, biography written by a fan. She said that it was accurate except for the word "minor" in the phrase "minor plastic surgery".
 * She jokes that she started her career as a dancer at the fictional "Itchy Kitty" in Reseda, California, which is the only job she would be qualified to do if she did not have her radio show.
 * She publicized a very stinging hate e-mail she received.
 * She jokes that the show's owner wants her dead because he has taken out a life insurance policy on her.
 * She claims to have the supernatural ability to make men gay, because men that she dated in the past have come out of the closet. It has been suggested by Ward, Lavoie, and callers that she use her "gay-ray" to sabotage campaigns and tenures of various politicians.

Other running gags
Other running gags featured in the show include:

Miller, Ward and Lavoie sometimes deal in falsehoods, fallacies, or outright slanderous lies, merely for humorous purposes; they don't really believe these, as evidenced by the fact that they tag "...allegedly" on to the end of the sentences.
 * "...allegedly."

The Republican Party's selection of Boehner as House Majority Leader spawned the feature "Boner Watch 2006" (revised for 2007), which tells stories of Boehner's links to Jack Abramoff and other lobbyists. The feature is accompanied by the announcement "Boner Watch 2007. How long will this Boner last? If your Boner lasts more than four hours, consult your lobbyist."
 * Boner Watch

The "Fun Stack" is a collection of odd inconsequential stories that serve as a respite from the day's main news stories. Many of these stories have a sexual or adult element. When Miller announces that she is about to do a story from the "Fun Stack", Lavoie responds with a child-like "Yay!" Sometimes an alternate title is given to the stack if there is a particular theme. For example, the story that a Hooters Restaurant was planning to open a franchise in the Big Beaver Corridor near Detroit led to the creation of the "Beaver Stack", in which Miller reads e-mails from listeners describing place names that are double entendres.
 * Fun Stack

The show features fictitious game show titles applied to certain situations, accompanied by the Wheel of Fortune or Let's Make a Deal theme. Most are preceded by the intro "And thanks for playing ..." or "It's time for another edition of ... ", and include
 * Game Shows
 * "Wheel of Right Wing Hypocrites"
 * "Republicans Eating Their Own" (and less often, "Democrats Eating Their Own")
 * "Grasping for Straws"
 * "Really Bad Analogies"
 * "People Who Need to Be Thinned From the Herd"
 * "You're Completely Wrong"
 * "To Tell the Truth"

"Guess the Quote" is a frequent segment where Miller reads (or plays a soundclip of) a quote and asks Ward to guess who said it, backed by the theme from "Final Jeopardy!". Even if Ward knows the answer, he purposely guesses someone who could not have possibly made the quote, perhaps a long-forgotten celebrity or minor historical figure. Miller often uses a series of quotes with a "theme" (such as all quotes said by the same person), with Ward also having a theme to his incorrect guesses. Lavoie sometimes partakes in the "game within a game" of guessing Ward's theme.
 * Guess the Quote

Originating from the O'Reilly Factor, "Homoerotic Corner" takes soundbites out of context and implies a gay subtext. Miller states that she is not making fun of homosexuals, but of those who demean homosexuals and who would find it insulting to be considered one.
 * Homoerotic Corner

To parody claims by Bill O'Reilly (as well as some other pundits) that the left-wing media takes quotes from right-wing figures out of context, "Out of Context Theatre" features clips of O'Reilly with blatant misuses of context. Other than "Out of Context Theatre", quotes are usually in the form of original recordings, or transcripts when a recording is not available.
 * Out of Context Theatre

Whenever a person (either a caller or show host) intimates something sexual in nature or something they know is blatantly wrong, such as "salacious rumors" about President Bush and Condoleezza Rice, they get sent to the "penalty box" as a "punishment", accompanied by a buzzer.
 * Penalty box

The parody of the commercial for HeadOn features a clip of George W. Bush saying "September the 11th" followed by the commercial's "Apply directly to the forehead", then repeated. This points out Bush's frequent and repetitive references to September 11th when explaining a variety of policies.
 * September the 11th — Apply directly to the forehead

This Ward character originated with a story about Texas State Representative Al Edwards (see ), but is now often used in conjunction with news items that have sexual connotations. Miller almost never introduces "Representative Squeezy McFeelpants", instead allowing Lavoie to say it. Squeezy expresses outrage over the story while 1970s porn music plays in the background. His comments become more and more lascivious, typically vowing to personally investigate further, until he is hauled away by the authorities.
 * Squeezy McFeelpants

The nickname was also used in reference to another American, Donald Thompson, a former Oklahoma Judge who was convicted of using a penis pump while presiding over court cases. He was nicknamed "Judge Penis Pump" and "Judge Squeezy McFeelpants".

For stories in other countries, the Squeezy McFeelpants character has spawned many international counterparts (sometimes called collectively "the International House of Perverts"):
 * Australia: "Fingers Billabong", who investigated Sheilas involved with "Botox and Booze" parties.
 * Britain: "Mashy McGrabbass" (or "McGrabbarse", per Ward's pronunciation), following the British Cheerleading Association's ban on skimpy uniforms due to concerns that they may "encourage dangerous crash diets".
 * Bulgaria: A fictitious unnamed Bulgarian, in reference to a Bulgarian woman's breast implants saving her life by acting as air bags during an automobile accident.
 * France: "Squeezy de Press Patelone", who would like to curb French teen binge drinking.
 * Germany: "Squeezling von Fühlhosen", based on a German radio station manager who fired a female disc jockey named DJ Lady Ray because she was wearing skirts which were "too short" and tops which were "too low"
 * Italy: "Padré de fia Pataloné", in reference to an Italian priest (Father Felice) who posted a sign at the entrance to his church which read "God knew what your navel looked like before you were born, so there is no need to expose it in church".
 * India: Without giving the character a proper nickname, the April 27, 2007 show featured an Indian version of Squeezy, specifically an Indian judge who took umbrage with American actor Richard Gere kissing Indian actress Shilpa Shetty.
 * Ireland: "Seamus McShillelaghpants" referred to a socially conservative Irish politician alluded to during a St. Patrick's Day broadcast.
 * Mexico: "Squeezy a Poca Patalones", who wanted to ban nude bicycling, following a protest by nude bicyclists in Mexico City.

References to the word beaver in various contexts, often sent in by readers.
 * Beaver Stack

Callers will often begin by asking if they could be appointed the official 'whatever' of the Stephanie Miller Show, such as "I am just wondering if I could be appointed the official left-wing plumber of the Stephanie Miller Show?" Such requests are invariably granted.
 * Official xxx of the Stephanie Miller Show

Miller came across a story describing the rivalry between Mini Kiss and Tiny Kiss, two KISS tribute bands made up of little people. Miller hopes to have either (or both) bands at her fictional weddings with her "Future Husbands". Comments about these bands are accompanied by a sped-up version of the KISS song "Rock and Roll All Nite". After the original story, variations of the gag soon followed, such as a sped-up version of "Bohemian Rhapsody" by the fictional Mini Queen.
 * Tiny Kiss/Mini Kiss