User:Sam.canaz/Social media in education/Fadude Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Sam.canaz


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Sam.canaz/Social_media_in_education?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Social media in education

Evaluate the drafted changes
Unclear which section or subsection this draft is supposed to be for, and is also unclear if this is a new section in the article or editing a preexisting article. Draft is sourced well and citations do not appear to plagiarize at all, and the paraphrasing used is short and is very clearly denoted in the draft. Some wording can sound off, as it sometimes shifts to a voice of persuasion rather than neutrality. Example: "The endless functions of Excel make it not only a useful app for students, but also for professionals in a wide variety of career fields." Sentence can be rewritten to sound more neutral, such as, "Students and professionals in various fields alike have benefitted greatly due to the many functions of Excel."

Since the draft is under "social media in education," the first paragraph revolving around Microsoft problems may not entirely fit the overall topic, as Microsoft programs may not fall under social media (but I also could be wrong and looking at this the wrong way). Second paragraph revolving around YouTube and in particular, TED Talks, are a perfect contribution to the overall topic and give concise, neutral examples of social media in education. Overall, the writing of the draft is concise, although there are few instances of extra wordiness that can be removed. Images also help to improve the article by providing immediate reference to what is being talked about, and the images are clear in their message.