User:Scooby7829/Psychological effects of Internet use/Ms0615 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Scooby7829


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Scooby7829/Psychological effects of Internet use


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Psychological effects of Internet use

Overall I think that the section you added compliments the article well! I only have a few suggestions which mostly just cover grammar and punctuation errors:


 * In this sentence: "This article intel’s that young teens have chosen to constantly text, or email over the internet or across text message instead of having a physical interaction with one another."--I do not think the word "intel's" should be in a possessive form, but I am also unsure of how to best use the word in this context. It might be best to ask our instructor for guidance on this one...


 * Also, rather than saying "...instead of having a physical interaction with one another" I would rewrite it to say, "having physical interactions with one another." The reason being is that you referred to "young teens" (plural) in the beginning of the sentence, therefore you should refer to their interactions**, rather than a singular interaction.


 * In this sentence: "The authors go on to say that real communication among society have decreased dramatically and are have decreased also among people that are living together."--I would change "have decreased" to "has decreased" or you could say something along the lines of, "real communication among members of society have decreased" AND there is a typo after that, "...**and are have decreased also** among people that are living together."--the correction could potentially be, "...and have/has also decreased among people that are living together." I put the have/has because that will depend on how you write the first part of the sentence.
 * In this sentence: "In this sense the authors feel as though yes, they are being connected technologically but it is leading to an unintended factor of them being isolated physically."--There should be a comma after "though" (feel as though, yes, they are being connected). I would also personally specify who "they" are...because in the last sentence you're referring to people in society but in the following sentence you mention teens, so I think you should replace "they" with the group of people you're talking about.
 * In this sentence: "Teens over usage of social media is integrating a huge impact on their social life."--"Teens over usage of social media..." should be "Teens' overuse of social media..."
 * You ended the last sentence, "Talking or texting via social media is beginning to become second nature in[1]" with the word "in" followed by the footnote--I can't tell if this is a typo, but you should just end the sentence at "second nature." then add the footnote/citation (you don't actually need to incorporate it into the sentence).