User:Scotty175/Violence against women in India/Nathanfielder Peer Review

The Wikipedia Page "Violence against women in India" encompasses the forms of inflictions women in India face, including sexual crimes, assault, abuse, murder, and more. The page includes various statistical data pieces indulging in the increase of reported dowry deaths, increase of assaults to insult modesty, and admissions such as Indian men abusing their wives through physical assaults or rape. The author also mentions specific instances or case studies of these horrific inflictions in order for readers to visualize and understand the severity of these assaults: for example, in the "Honour killings" sections, the author describes a father decapitating his own daughter after she was dating someone the father did not approve of. The sub-headings include information revolving the types of violence and their reported cases and clarifications regarding the legality of violence: for example, the author acknowledges that India is one of fifty countries which have legalized marital rape. The article's insightful manner shocks the readers and provides many links and resources for those interested in the subject.

I found the site to be very informative, creating an unbiased narrative while expanding upon the significance of statistical data. I genuinely was very intrigued by this page, considering I was not privy to a majority or really any of the information featured throughout the article; despite the tragedy and importance of the content, this topic is not really taught in school. The article touches on female infanticide, something I had never heard of understood until reading this page. I am impressed how the author was able to touch on many aspects regarding violence against women in India, and I liked the mentioning of case studies. However, I wish there was an elaboration, such as a sub-heading, regarding how these inflictions and violent acts impact how the women view themselves. How do these adopted views shape these women and the respect for themselves? Do they believe they should be treated like this? I also am curious how violence in India originated/evolved, and how it has almost been adopted as a social norm, considering there is not really an explanation towards its origin.

There are a few minor edits; for example, in the "Perpetuation" heading, there is not a sufficient elaboration regarding the description of a "proper care" for survivors of violence. What in India's society constitutes as proper care, and how do we know it really works? I also don't really know what "insult to modesty" is. What does modesty mean in this setting? What is the difference in the graphic between "Assaults with intent to outrage modesty" and "insults to the most of women"? I feel as though this section is underdeveloped, considering an explanation of the article would have helped readers understand the table's significance and how it relates to violence against women in India.

Overall, I found this Wikipedia page to be an insightful and informative piece, bringing awareness to topics not widespread and providing statistics and stories to keep the audiences interested and understanding.

General info
Scotty175
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * Violence against women in India
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Violence against women in India

Evaluate the drafted changes
Pt.1

Intro: I feel as though this adequately introduces the topic without being too vague or specific. However, I feel as though "Extent" could be changed to "Statistics" to be more formal and informative, or include statistics in the title as that is the main purpose (i.e. Extent Statistics).

There is a lack of detail and case studies per each topic. I would add more case studies so there are more human evidence and sympathy for these topics. For example, the "Forced child marriage" had about 4 sentences. I would be really interested in citations and references to work which further develop the headings you have created, considering these visual descriptions could help further audience's understandings of the material.

The insult to modesty section is a bit random and lacks detail, and is not thoroughly explained. I would add citations to what insult to modesty is, and elaborate on that.

Pt. 2

For all of these sections I would also incorporate information on why it is partial to India and how India law punishes the people committing these crimes/lack thereof.

Content can be improved through elaboration of titles (Insult to modesty), case studies (specific evidence of these circumstances), and overall more conciseness when organizing each of the sections. I feel as though there is not necessarily a structure to the order of heading and sub-headings, and the article is thrown around a bit: however, I do understand the order in which items are presented upon further looking, but this could maybe be done more neatly.

I also would add a section regarding the reaction to violence of women in India and how the women themselves react to these perpetrating incidents, which could further understanding regarding the perception women have in India and if there are any protests or call-to-action type occurrences deriving from the information in this article.

I really liked how you developed on this topic and introduced it to the class, and included statistics to further the information presented in the Wikipedia page: I feel as though people could really learn from this article.