User:Seabuntin/Burkholderia cenocepacia/Seaoli12oceans12 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Seabuntin, Ebuntin, Zec57612, Ccd38148


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * Sandbox Draft


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Article Link

Evaluate the drafted changes
The first line in the opening paragraph is very long and wordy. Would make it easier to read if broken into 2 sentences. Other than that the opening summary paragraph is very solid!

The taxonomy section seems to have to little of information for it to be its own heading. It might make more sense to make it a subheading under the microbiology section.

The pathogenicity section is good, but i would move it to be after the microbiology section of the article so that the information can flow better. People are going to look at this page mostly for information about the microbe, not the disease it causes. While that information is helpful for the article overall once the rest of the information is added, I think it shouldn’t be mentioned until the end.

I would move the information about the actual microbe (what is currently under the microbiology section in the article and what is written inder characteristics in the sandbox draft) to the beginning of the article since this page is about the microbe and not the disease.