User:Senorspicyweiner89/sandbox

Walking backwards, surprisingly enough, was only invented a hundred years ago. In a small border town in 1905 walking backwards was invented by Jenevive McTytites. She was an immigrant from Northern Ireland. She'd been accused of killing her neighbor's goat with a brick the size of a man's head. After the trial ended she was ran into a corner to by townsfolk to be hanged, however to their surprise she took a step backwards rather than fowards. It is thought that before this iconic step people did not walk backwards, but instead walked fowards at a different angle, in fact at either a 179 degree or 181 degree angle from where their toes pointed, never exactly backwards until Mctytites. Her actions on that day affect us all in many ways, although, her actions caused the townspeople to gointo a complete and utter panic. Causing them to not only burn her at the cross but to burn down the whole town sacrificing many small children to the fire in order to apologize to God for their evil neighbor, and for not burning her like a hotdog left on the grill for too long earlier.

Sources: The Old English History, by The Queen. A short History of nearly Everything, by some dude. And personal experience, for McTytites is my great grandmother, in fact my Grandfather never truly recovered enough to ever see someone step backwards again, the one time someone did he was in the Battle of little Bighorn, his name was Custer. He saw an Indian take a step back into the woods and he freaked the fuck out. Like he went ape shit, he told his men to charge and every last one of them was killed because he would not allow them to step back.