User:Sheepreplicant9402/Faustulus/MinervaNix Peer Review

Peer review
General info


 * Reviewing: Sheepreplicant9402
 * Link to draft: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Sheepreplicant9402/Faustulus

Lead

The lead describes what the article is about. If you are able to add the linguistic properties of Faustulus' name and how his name fits into creation stories would be interesting. Though I am not entirely certain if adding a female point of review is necessary for this article.

Content


 * You did a good job added to the overall article, creating a more relevant page for the subject. The content that you added was appropriate and helped to    round out the article.

Tone and Balance


 * The content added is neutral from what I can tell and there are no claims that appear heavily biased towards a position.

Sources and References


 * The sources seem to come from reliable sources. They reflect available literature on the topic. There is a historically marginalized individual (Livy). The links to websites that are on the page do work.

Organization

(suggested changes look like (Word/s)


 * Content is well-written, easy to read and well organized.
 * I know this is not an English class but just to let you know the last sentence of your first paragraph is really long, you can add a period after the word “own” to split it. Because you also do change from speaking about the parents to Romulus, so it is a subject change.
 * So, for example it could look like this “Faustulus and Acca Larentia then raised the boys as their own( . ) (Until eventually or Until) Romulus killed King Amulius, later killed his brother Remus, and founded the city of Rome "in the place where they [Romulus and Remus] had been raised."”
 * In the section Representation in Livy’s From the Foundations of the City. In the fifth sentence from the bottom you wrote “child”, all you need to do is change it to children.
 * “Either way, Faustulus carried the infants back to his sheepfold where he presented the child children to his wife to rear”.
 * Also in your paragraph Representation in Livy's From the Foundations of the City there is a double “the” in the sentence “When the water receded, it dropped (the the) boys on a flat piece of land where a she-wolf (Lupa) found and nursed them.”

Images and Media


 * Images are well-captioned. All three images are public domain, and the layout of these images are visionally appealing. The images help to connect to the    article.

Overall impressions


 * With your additions, the article is more complete, and thank you for editing out the coin sentences from the original article. It was confusing to understand.    Deleting them has made the article have a better flow of information with no confusion.

Overall evaluation


 * Good job on adding to the article, finding good sources for your information, and organizing the information into clear sections that allows for the reader to follow along. I placed some suggestions in the different sections of the peer review where I think that you can add and or change things to your article.
 * I liked your idea about adding another section about the linguistic properties of Faustulus' name and how he fits into the creation myth.