User:Shriya175/Caste politics/Reneemessinger Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Shriya175


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Shriya175/Caste_politics?veaction=edit&preload=Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Caste politics

Evaluate the drafted changes
The draft looks great! I can tell lots of time went into all of your additions. I would suggest that you copyedit the first sentence of the original mainspace text because it's very wordy and does't quite make sense. You could change, "Studies have published which presented evidence would suggested that the influence of caste has been declining since the mid-1990s" into "Presented evidence in published studies suggests that the influence of caste has been declining since the mid-1990s." I feel like many areas in the original text could be reworded to be easier to read, but it's not necessary that you do so for all of them. I think you transitioned into your paragraph well, but there could be more of an introductory sentence to ease the reader into the discussion of lower-caste groups. I see you also quoted an article here, and while that's good for essays, to my knowledge, I don't think it's allowed on Wikipedia. I would remove “nonhierarchical social imaginaries" and restate the sentence in your own words. Also, the last few sentences should be backed up by more evidence or just bring in the same evidence that you have earlier in the paragraph, if that's where your information came from. There is also a period that I'm not sure if you meant for it to be a comma or you forgot to capitalize the letter of the next word, but here it is: The prominent influence of Sanskritization meant that mobilizations in the North were restricted by conforming to the existing hierarchies . and in practical terms, this reinforced the dominance of elites within a specific region. (see the underlined portion). I think this would be great as two separate sentences by getting rid of the "and in practical terms" and simply start the next sentence off with "This reinforced..." to give it a more confident approach. Overall, I think all of the information you've provided is very relevant and it's all well-written. I especially like how you included the specific pages that each piece of evidence was found on. I would just copyedit more of the original text, add more citations to your text, give an introductory sentence, and fix the quotations as well as the grammatical mistake.