User:Sirlurker

Sirlurker

"We are Ka-Tet, We are one from the many." Roland - Dark Tower IV - Stephen King. Sometimes I wonder of my own ka-tet. My own group which somehow seems connected and familiar in so many of the same ways. We are connected in some strange way.... NOTE STORY IS NOT FACT. IT IS THE FICTION OF A SOMETIMES DISILLUSIONAL INDIVIDUAL. IT IS MY PERSPECTIVE OF HOW THINGS ARE ONLY. SIMILARITIES TO ANY PERSON, SITE, OR THING IN REALITY IS PURELY INTENTIONAL BUT SHOULD NOT BE CONSIDERED CORRECT.

Prologue: Once upon a time in a place not too far away, there was a world known as the Inter-Net. This world had many kingdoms. {aol, yahoo, ebay, etc}.

One day in this world, a king began a search for a treasure that his Queen had been searching high and low to find. It was a treasure known as the PEZ. The Queen had a grand collection but wanted more. The rich king sent out a call across the world known as the Inter-Net. He called far and wide using a device known as the WEB. He discovered a place where the Great PEZ was discussed at length. Many traders and collectors heard his call for pez and answered. Oh, the joy of the Queen was overwhelming. Traders from all parts of the world begin using the web site. Soon they discovered that each had many other treasures to sell besides the Pez. They begin to bargain and argue amongst themselves. Two Traders who wanted the same item began to offer more and more gold to buy the item they wanted. Arguments got fierce and war was immenient. The King and Queen had an idea. Thus was founded the kingdom known as THE BAY. A kingdom where traders from around the world and the Inter-NET could offer their good for bids and ebay would mediate disputes for a price. Peace and Wealth flowed thru the kingdom. As time went on, the King and Queen had so many traders and buyers that they begin to impose a tax to use their kingdom. Queen Meg was appointed ruler of this financial kingdom. The kingdom grew and grew. Cafes for the traders to relax at between trading sprung up everywhere. The world known as the Inter-Net expanded as well. But alas, the kingdom was not at peace. Disputes arose and in the cafes, and the market place, many a squabble did arise. A small band of e-bayers decided to sail forth and begin work on a new kingdom. Our hero, Sirlurker arrives on the scene.

Chapter 1

Sir Lurker, Lord of the Lurkers is a likable chap. Willing to listen as well as give advice on many matters. He stumbled upon the Kingdom quite by accident. His love of music drew him to E-bay. He had long searched for a collection of music - a box set by the well-known minstrel Elton John. One day he decided to search at E-bay - a kingdom he had read about but never visited. Lo and behold, there was the item he had searched frantically for - not just one but several. He was able, after much hand wringing and nervousness, to bag his collection from a country known as the Great White North. Sir lurker was pleased. His collection was expanded. Time passed and Sir Lurker decided to search the Kingdom of E-bay for more treasures. He did and he bought. Finally his passion for an ancient game known as Rook took hold of him and he began searching for Rook cards all over the kingdom of E-bay. He found many, and was able to add more to his collection. Well, one day, after a hard day searching, he happened upon a meeting place in E-bay called the CAFÉ. Sir Lurker was stunned. He saw sights and sounds and discussions that amazed and delighted him. People were helping each other and discussing things in ways he never had imagined. Sir Lurker observed the members from time to time and occasionally would pose a question of his own. He grew to like the members of the Café and made it a point to drop in every once and while. Sir Lurker observed many troubles there at times but did not feel the need to intervene or join any of the conflicts. Then, the Joker Gail got into trouble while practicing her art Sir Lurker had never spoken to the Joker but had seen many of her jokes plastered throughout the Café. The cafes did ring loud and long with the laughter caused by the many tools at Gail's disposal. Some did envy the Joker. One day, Gail was brought before the Judges of THE BAY and was accused of spreading smut instead of joy because of one certain joke. Gail was banned from the kingdom of BAY. Many members did become annoyed and said so to the kingdom. The kingdom ignored them. Sir Lurker decided it was time to get off the fence and vote one way or the other. He picked up Gail's offensive joke and posted it along with several other peeps in the café(Now Sir Lurker had no idea at the time what copy and paste was and the joke was long, so it took a good deal of effort from him to accomplish this feat). Even a travelling poet known as CP reposted the joke. The kingdom of ebay was not amused and many a member was expelled. Sir Lurker heard some news. Gail and a fellow banned member CP were meeting in a New Kingdom called Gold's hearing about it from a co-patriot named of George. . Sir Lurker immediately took a trip over and found nothing. No one was even in the streets. Sometimes he would see a red head named Sweetpee and occasionally he would talk to her. He discovered a gracious Lady L was a resident there. Many times a bouncing dragon could be seen dancing through the land. Sir Lurker came out of the shadows more and more and soon was spending more time in the lounge and less in the balcony. It was peaceful in the kingdom. Fun and games were rampant and a great List-A-Thon was celebrated throughout the land. Sir Lurker soon met wonderful folks - Lady L knighted him and gave him his title and bestowed upon him the Order of the Blurkers). The wandering Minstrel showed him(some say goaded) how to sell some of his treasures at the market. A street walking pea pod bought some of his musings - Sir Lurker had caught the fever and soon became a member of ROLL(Royal Order of Listing Lurkers). Soon he was trading his wares just like the peers he had seen at E-bay had done. But trouble soon came to paradise. A freak had invaded and been repelled. But envy and jealously soon reared their ugly heads. Member's complained that Gold's should go out and conquer other kingdoms quickly - but the kingdom was not ready. Promises of rewards to the faithful were not kept. Members complained that the kingdom needed to put out banners and flyers and do some real world advertising. Tensions begin to increase and harsh words were spoken. A fire from hell arose and was expelled - only to return in a new form again and again. Broken eggs were disputed, feedback numbers were examined, and lifestyle choices were debated. Members became Naru'd, sometimes by their own free will and sometimes not. The power of WOMD begins to being used more and more frequently. Peace was restored after a time. Then the Great Reserve tax Exodus from the kingdom of E-bay occurred. The kings, queens and lords the kingdom of Ebay had decided that they needed more money.. A reserve tax of a dollar was instilled thoughout the kingdom. Cries and shouts where heard all over the cafes of Ebay. Discussions and fights were comman, many fearing that the great cafes would soon be shut down. There was a major exodus from the kingdom of Bay to Golds. Many of the members of the Café arrived in the New Kingdom of Gold's. The roads into and around the kingdom of Gold's became crowded and hard to travel The kingdom was surviving. Smaller but still there. The kingdom was talked about. A flying horse threw down challenges, which were picked up by the members. Bitterness still spread like wildfire at times. What had become of our hero Sir Lurker? He was branching out and discovering smaller kingdoms. He begin trading and spreading his musings throughout the kingdom of Gold's. He set up an island to display his writings but alas, Sir Lurker could not stay out of trouble. His big mouth runneth over. Debates flowed though the land and Sir Lurker got involved in many and though he meant no harm, some got angry. Very angry. Some got hurt. Sir Lurker became a renegade. Refusing to accept too many rules and regulations that he felt were unneeded and selfish. Sir Lurker begin to form an alliance among members. Sir Lurker left, twice he did, to do some soul searching. The great Sheila became disturbed at Sir Lurker and seemed ready to crush him. At the brink, Sir Lurker decided to back down to save his role in the kingdom. The battle was not here, not now. Maybe later. Peace was once again restored. Gold's celebrated its one-year anniversary. The numbers remained steady and slowly climbed. The members could once again be heard LOL and ROFLPIMP. Gold's was still unheard of throughout the land but loyalty was rewarded with wiping the debt slate clean for the members. A grand renovation was begun and implemented. Golds had entered a new chapter. The final chapter…hmmm..remains to be seen.

Chapter 2


 * These descriptions are figments of my own imagination. Please don't feel offended by my lame remarks. They are offered in jest and not meant to do harm.**

Ahhh, it is a glorious kingdom. Full of princes and princesses, lords and ladies, jokers and soldiers. Sometimes it is filled to the brim, other times not so much. Watch out for the moat - it has piranhas. Don't knock over any cabana boys - easily distinguishable by their blue jeans and no shirts. Let's take a brief glance at some of Sir Lurker's characters he has come across: We have Dee - our Hawaiian princess. Searcher of lost souls and keeper of the bears. If you quit posting in the lounge, she is the first to inquire why and to worry. We have nojee, the high priestess of the Royal Order of Incorrigibles. Full of sprite and spirit and fast with a joke. Mind your P's and Q's when she's around. Not a comment does she miss and she is also in charge of the RACK. Lady L is sorta the unwilling benevolent ruler at times. The constant in the lounge that pulls our conversations together one to another. If we didn't have her daily presence in the lounge, our posts would run far in between. How would we keep up with each other's lives without someone there to see the post from the occasional posters? She is also in charge of titles and orders and such. Over there is toy our caretaker of the playful dragon Puff. Sometimes it is wondered among us who is in charge of who J. In charge of our playful side at times and she is also holder of the closet keys. Helpful she is to those lost in the lounge, a lurking presence, which can be found at all hrs of the day and nite - at times a master lister and always keeps support on their toes. Over here we have Lady Karen - our wandering Minstrel. She represents our kindlier, gentler selves I think sometimes. Our #1 Master Lister, she is our biggest cheerleader at times here, there and everywhere. See Chippie, our neighbor to the north. A feisty yet sweet thing who is incorrigible to the core. She is always in search of some "pretties". Leota, our defender against the wild Javelin. Dot, our caretaker of the cats. Cool, our resident gigolo. Or is that his evil twin? Watch out ladies. Sweetpee, our darling red head who takes care of all the cabbage patch babies in the lounge. George, a curmudgeonly old Doc. Home diets and homegrown ducks are a specialty. 3bs - Bryan - our resident male master lister as of late. A late comer but rising fast. Aservant - John - Who whispers by now and again in the stillness of the nite. Lynne - our absent minded cross-stitch artist who has a mind like a steel trap rusted shut. She pops in to entertain now and again. Mitch - who only wants an unfair advantage in life who passes through like a locomotive once in awhile. Elecdata/Toollady - The resident rule keepers gate keepers. Gail - MIA but still occasionally starts our day with some sunshine. Delenn - AWOL - But still in our hearts and mind and lurks about still. Gary - our sports card expert and private investigator….;) Jason..the New kid on the block who had barely earned his title before the great storm.. Sir Lurker decided to take a Sabbatical from the Castle and go into hibernation for a month or two.

Chapter 3

And then a terrible storm hit the castle Gold's. A storm called bankruptcy. The castle was demolished. The knights and ladies of the Gold's court scattered like ashes in the wind. Sir Lurker came out of retirement and set up a temporary haven at E that some of the lost wandered to. Karen was there, so was mippy. Nojee soon arrived as did Lady L. Some folks who Sir Lurker had never seen made it there as well. But the haven was unstable and could not substain many members at a time. Many new sites where looked at and studied. Sir Lurker went questing again. He was led to a village by SisterSusan. A village called Edeal which was also fighting the mighty E-bay. Pleasant folks who seem to have weathered a cleansing storm of their own. Sir Lurker wandered the Village streets looking for familiar faces and learning some new ones. There was a gold miner by the name of olekountry, and a master lister known as BigDaddy. Sir Lurker reluctantly set up a temp home for a time. Then, Great News Came across the land. A small kingdom known as Dutchbid had decided to rebuild Gold's from the ground up. To incorporate it into its kingdom. Golden folks everywhere rejoice. The knights and ladies flocked to the new site to look it over. Alas, it was not an outstanding site. But promises of a New Gold's Kingdom with a Royal courtyard and castle like before where made by the great king Eric. Would it grow and have better luck than Gold's. Ah, only Fate knows. Uneasiness set in among the members. Tempers flared. Trolls abounded. Harsh words were exchanged. Who would survive and who would move on?…..

Up next…the tale of SYI….:)

Chapter Four

As in all tales, Sirlurker's was about to take a twist. The Haven he had established as a temporary place of refuge begin to grow. The E haven was taken over by the kingdom of Yahoo, becoming more stable and useable. The citizens of gold's who were already there were joined by some from dutchbid. The King Gregg and Queen Janice from the kingdom of Golds set up a camp in the Haven. A rebel group known as the MAM begin to splinter from the kingdom of ebay. Rapid fire attacks were common and many were persuaded to join the ever growing kingdom of Yahoo. It grew. It prospered. But then greed stepped in and a listing tax was imposed on the new members of the kingdom of Yahoo and soon peeps were looking on the horizon for something better…. King Eric from Dutchbid arrived to persuade his subjects that Dutchbid was for real. Sirlurker was amazed at the growth of the Haven. Meetings were held, discussions were made. But alas, old tensions in the citizenship flared up once again. Rumors and accusations flew again, flowing over into the village of OTWA. Queen Janice left as did eventually King Gregg. But before leaving, KG told the Haveners that a new, better kingdom was being constructed. That the ideas from Golds would rise again like a phoenix from the ashes. And so it did. Sheila of old was introduced to the Haven and befriended the golden oldies. Past was past and she had exciting news of a new, brighter, richer kingdom. One to be known as SYI. The ex citizens of golds arrived and were pleased. Their wares were once again placed up for sell. Their numbers rose..Many new faces were greeted As well as some old friends returning from golds. A master lister known as NCSPORTS arrived to set up a major shop. An unusual curator named FBNE arrived and listed. All seemed right again. The kingdom rose and fell and try to make its name know throughout the Auctionland. Hope was kept anew. And then it happened. The Great Checkout castrophre at the kingdom of ebay. Many of the citizens had finally had enough and begin to visit the kingdom of SYI. Stephanie, Mary, Blondie, Chase, TOB, Parts for outboards. Parts begin a major shop and brought many of his customers from the Kingdom Of Bay along with him. List-a-thons were celebrated, news was spread throughout the Internet land that syi was the place to be. Yet again, the numbers could not sustain above 20,000. But there is always hope. A narud member of the kingdom of Ebay decided to check out SYI. He and his followers from the café of DNF arrived in great numbers at SYI. As the 1st year birthday celebrations begin, the number once again begin to rise…a goal of 50,000 was thrown down to the citizens…..the race was on again.....

To be continued..