User:Slorge

Slorge Gridlock
Fictional character created by Scott Goodhart to be an online persona.

From Scott Goodhart: "Earlier in the evening, we had seen an interview that I'd done on a TV news story on the local station, they put my last name as 'Gridhart', which I expected. They always get my name wrong in print or TV.   Later, when we were onstage, I started to say "We're going to do a slow George Strait song" but it came out "now, we're going to play a slorge.....uh....slow...etc'. The next day, I felt I had a pretty good name for an online persona, which no one else had ever used. Do a google for 'slorge' and most of what comes up is my stuff."

Mission Statement
I am new to writing to the wikipedia (registered 6/2005), but plan to make as many contributions as I can. I may have some fun, and I hope to inform some people.

- Scott Goodhart - creater of Slorge Gridlock

Biography of Slorge Gridlock
Assumed born, and left for dead on a go-cart track in southeastern Missouri, Slorge Gridlock has tried to make a mark for himself on the Internet. This backward, sometimes vile, swamp dweller was raised by geese in the wild and discovered in his early teens by a family in Georgia, where he was nesting for the winter.

Currently, (2005) Scientist place the age of Mr. Gridlock somewhere between the age of 35 and 45. During his formative years in human society, Slorge, became an avid student of classical ballet and the historic art of phrenology. And, in a freak occurrence of events, wound up graduating high school twice, completing two full curriculums, though the explanation for this has never been brought to light. Though he claims to have read Hamlet one hundred and twelve times, he cannot quote a single line, however, he says he has seen the movie Pee-wee's Big Adventure only once, on commercial television and can recite nearly the whole movie. The years 1987-1991 are a complete blank to Slorge, but when asked, he points to a specific bump on the back of his head and grins curiously.

When asked why he turned to music, and particularly, internet music, Slorge simply states, "Ah had tuh do sumthin’, whut with constantly cawlin’ thuh crop circle hotline and my need for nice things. Ah shur wood lahk yoo tuh buy my ree-cordin’s. I’d be hummin’ buckets." followed by, "What are you lookin’ at? Don’t ya eyeball me, ya panty-waist!"

Due to his wildly unbelievable stories of UFOs, dimensional shifts and bigfoot, many scientist disregard anything Slorge has to say on his own behalf, though Slorge seems only vaguely aware of his origin, if at all.