User:SmokeyJoe77/Biblical studies/Kaimcamc Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

SmokeyJoe77


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:SmokeyJoe77/Biblical studies


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Biblical studies

Evaluate the drafted changes
Lead

A new theory was added to the lead, which shows the changes made in the article.

Content

Overall I think that all the content that is added is relevant and seems to be up to date. The original article is pretty short, so I do like the content and sections that you are going to add. I am a little confused because your draft says you are adding a section titled "the Bible as history" but in the original article there is a "History of the Bible" section. Could those be combined?

Tone and Balance

From what I read in your draft, the tone and balance of the writing is pretty neutral. I feel like this topic has a specific tone when reading about it and I feel that your writing would fit in nicely with the original article.

Sources and References

The sources that you added seemed to be helpful and add good new information to the article. The sources are a good addition, but I would suggest added them to the reference list, so you make sure to not forget to cite your information.

Organization

I think that the organization of your draft and writing works well and would fit in the original article. One thing I am not sure of is where you would be adding the new sections. Knowing where the new sections would go would help understand, how good of an addition they would be to the article.

Overall Impression Overall, I think that you have a lot of great additions to the original article. I do like the additions you put into the lead, it helps address what you added to the article. I would suggest really thinking about where to put the new sections so that they don't disrupt flow in the article, but add good information to the article. I also liked the addition to the section of biblical criticism, I feel like it matches the flow of that section and adds good information. My last suggestion would be to make sure you cite your sources so that they end up in the actual references section.