User:Smookerjee

Kumquat the sport; Kumquat for short.

This notable sport is quickly gathering popularity in college campuses and is turning into a raging fad. It is essentially a game arising out of the subconscious of 8 intoxicated gentlemen of the University of Rochester Men's Rugby club 'The Uglies'.

History:

After an intense scrimmage among themselves on the September the 19th 2008, eight mildly good-looking fellows of the UR rugby club were drinking heavily when inspiration struck one of them while taking a leak near a tree. The fruits of the tree were small enough to fit in a beer cup and started to be used as a golf-ball, exemplifying the sparkling wits of these young men. As the drinking continued the fruits were named 'kumquats' due to the sexual reference of this word. Continuing with the hilarity of this situation the fellas held out their cups and the others tried to lob the fruits in the cups. There were 2 motivating factors of this move:

1) You could get the cup and make the cup-wielder chug the beer or splash the beer all over himself.

2) Pelt the cup-wielder as hard as possible with the fruit while laughing gregariously.(Dick move)

This rapidly turned into the sport of Kumquat as more people joined in due to limitless possibilities of this pastime.

The Rules:

The following are the official rules of this sport. Any rule breaking will be punished by chugging of beer and heavy pelting by quats.

1) The kumquats will be clean and not rotten. All such quats will be called 'Game-quats'.

2) The players will divide into 2 teams. All will hold beers and be prepared to imbibe. All will have a gamequat ready.The 2 teams will stand 5 yards apart.

3) Each team should have one person wearing a mouth guard.

4) All players of one team have to hold their beers close to each other and wait for the other team to shoot. No moving is allowed while the other team is shooting.

5) Any made cups of beer will result in the whole team chugging their beer.

6) Cover your nuts. Quats hurt.

7) The point of the game is to score points by making the cups. You win by making (1 + no. of player on each team) cups. The auxillary point of this game is to drink till you start thinking Brick is attractive or you fall over, whichever comes first.

8)You always win.