User:Stevenglenton/The Fooklertron

Geoff Fookes

A Brief History

The Fooklertron 6000 is the latest model in the world renowned Fookletron series and is at the frontline of current processing capacity and Bio-Engineered-Mechanization, particularly speed of calculation and ease of independant mining operations.

Inception

In the late 1950's, Geoff Fookes (a direct male line decendant of Ned Kelly and second cousin of George Lucas) was attempting to locate the source of the White Nile while walking backwards speaking only in a West Country accent, he found himself lying in a substance induced torpor in a field somewhere in Africa, watching several native women hypnotizing a Thompsons gazelle by repeatedly banging their heads into the ground rythmically, when he was struck with an idea so outrageous his hair turned purple and remained that way for several months, using the only things he could find to draw his idea (his underwear and a piece of dessicated crocodile faeces) the Fookletron was born and the world has never been the same since.

Fooklertrons were introduced in the 1960s and were designed primarily by Geoff Fookes at Hardakers then later BP, which led the market into the 1970s until Fookes left to form his own company, Fookes Research. He then took over the Fooklertron market with his bold, new, innovative designs, holding the top spot in Fooklertroning for five years (1985–1990). In the 1980s a large number of smaller competitors entered the market and this, combined with Geoff Fookes burgeoning substance dependancy saw bleak times for Fookes Research. But running parallel to the creation of the minifooklertron market a decade earlier, many of these small companies disappeared in the mid-1990s "Fooklertron market crash".

Today, Fooklertrons are typically one-of-a-kind custom designs produced by "traditional" companies such as Fookes and GF industries, who had purchased many of the 1980s companies to further their experience. Since October 2010, the Fooklertron-1A has been the fastest in the world; it is located in Geoff's shed.

Geoff Fookes lives in Kingston upon Hull with his 8th wife Eileen, he is said to have fathered between 30 to 50 children, and is rumoured to be the biological father of Liza Minnelli following his much publicised affair with Judy Garland. In a 2011 Time Magazine Poll Geoff Fookes was named the third most important person of the 20th century behind Bill Gates and Steve Jobs. He also has a gerbil called Keith.