User:Stief

Alexander Coffing
Alexander Coffing, also called alex for short, is an amazingly smart, buff, outrageously good looking person. He is so good looking that if we were to put a picture of him in this page you would be instantly blinded in his glory. Also because I couldnt figure out how to make a picture. He is the coolest cat on this side of the universe. He enjoys long walks on the beach and water polo with his rich exutive friends(if someone knows what water polo is please tell me). If we could show you a picture he would look like this.



Alex's overall beastliness
The story of Alex's beastliness started in 6th grade when he was not more than a twig with legs. His friends would always say he was super buff sarcastically. Soon Alex took their sarcasm and made it into fact. He lifted hay bails and hauled wood. He carried pails of water, pulled wagons and even drank raw eggs until He was able to make it known that he was no longer a twig, but the equivalent of a Greek God. His friends made fun of him no more because they were scared he would kill them. Nowadays Alex spends his time doing charity work and admiring his extreme buffness.

Have you ever considered using anything but B.S. in this page?
To be honest, no. I find that the truth is boring while crazy, insane, outrageous stories about things that never happened is way more fun. There is no one alive who would rather tell the boring truth about themselves than a exciting made up story about how they fought a bear (coming soon!). lets face it our whole society is made up of lies so whats a few more.

fighting the bear
When I first saw the bear I was on vacation in Alaska. My friends and I were busy doing something beastly that I havent came up with yet when all of the sudden one of my friends shouted, " Hey look a bear." I knew that the yell would catch the bear's attention anyway, so we did what was natural, we taunted it. As it turns out taunting a bear was not such a great idea(who knew?). So as my friends ran away I knew it was my job to fight off the bear. So I grabbed it by the head and threw it into the nearest tree before it could get back up I picked it up and took a bite out of its kidney. Then I preceeded to rip its heart out and shoved it down its throat. after that I pulled out every claw and hung its scattered remains on my cabin wall. It was only then that I knew my friends were safe.



Poker Techniques
Poker is a great way to make money if you know how to play. All you need is a deck of cards and some poker chips to start. using these techniques with experience will guarantee you success no matter who you play with. First of all you need to know that Poker is about 10% luck and 90% skill. The more skill you have the less you have to rely on luck. The other thing that you have to know before you start is that, even if you win a hand that does not necessarily mean that you played the hand the best possible way. Although you may win a hand due to luck once in a while, playing according to techniques and skills will guarantee you many more wins than playing according to luck. P.S., The following sections are written based on Texas Hold'em style poker.

The Order
The order of possible poker hands goes as follows

Royal Flush This is the top hand, the possibility of getting it is only 1 in the 2,598,960. It consists of 5 cards, 10 through Ace, that are in the same suit.

Straight Flush This is any 5 cards in a row of the same suit, probability is 40 out of 2,598,960.

4 of a Kind Any 4 cards that are the same. such as 4 Aces, 4 kings, etc. probability is 1 in 4165.

Full House One Pair and one three of a kind, probability is 1 in 694

Flush 5 cards in the same suit, Probability 1 in 509

Straight 5 cards in a row, ex. 1 through 5. Probability 1 in 255

3 of a Kind Any three cards of the same value, ex. three Aces. Probability 1 in 47

2 pair Literally, two pairs. Probability 1 in 21

1 pair 2 cards of the same value. Probability 1 in 2.3

High Card This is the highest card in your hand. You have a 1 in 2 chance of getting absolutely nothing, or high card.

If you have More questions on statistics see http://www.indepthinfo.com/probability-poker/

The Three Laws
The Three Laws of being a good poker player are a list of three very basic rules that a fellow player and I have come up with. They are guidelines to ensure maximum gain and minimum risk.

1. Don't Fold When You Can Check This is the most basic of the laws. It is also common sense. You should never give up your chips if you can see the next card without having to pay.

2. Don't Call a Bluff With Nothing This is important. If you think or know that someone else is bluffing you should not call them if you don't have at least a pair. Although you may win sometimes by calling with nothing, you are better off folding. Usually this will allow you to lose less money. To be safe, it is a good idea to fold anything lowest pair and under. You have to consider the statistics above. the chance of that person who is supposedly bluffing, of even having a pair is about 50 percent. If you don't have anything it is best to fold as you are unlikely to win.

3. NEVER SHOW YOUR CARDS IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO!!! This is by far the most important rule. By not showing your cards you make it much harder for other players to learn your techniques. It is very easy for someone to tell your bluffing patterns when you show them your cards, this rule should NEVER be broken.

These are the 3 laws. they are something you should know if you know nothing else.

Look At The Possibilities
Before you make a decision on whether or not to call, take into consideration the possibilities. Usually it is a good thing to see the flop, that is if you can do so without putting too much money in preflop. One of the most important things to remember is that the unless you have a pocket pair preflop, you don't have anything. For example, even if you have an Ace King suited, it is not good if the flop is 7,2,5 unsuited. In the same way even the lowest hands can become very good once the flop is turned. The general rule for calling preflop is call up to double the big blind and after that use discretion. Once the flop is turned you should decide whether or not you can afford to call a bet and how much you are willing to call. There are really no specific rules that can be set on how to decide whether or not to call bets on the flop but it is certain that if you do not have anything on the flop it is smart to fold. After the flop, the betting that you do has to be based on how your opponents play and what their strategy is.

Which Hands to Call
Some hands that you might consider calling on the flop or turn are: a pair, 4 cards of a straight, 4 cards of a flush, 3 cards of a straight if the cards are for ex. 3,5,6 and you have a 7 or a 2.

Hands that are "call anything hands" are: straight flush, four of a kind, full house, flush (if there are 3 of the suit on the table, if 4 or 5 of the suit is on the table use discretion to judge if your card of that suit is high enough to beat your opponents possible flush.), straight, triple (if its not on the table), two pair (if one or both of the pairs is not on the table)

Know Your Opponents
bluffer, lucky, amateur, conservative, risky This is by far the most important part of Poker, There are 5 major types of poker strategies.

This type of player relies on you to fold in order to make money. It is very effective on conservative players. It is also very effective when you have considerably more chips than your opponents. This method is risky, but if used at the right times can be beneficial.
 * Bluffer

This type of player is naturally lucky. They may or may not have a strategy but no matter what they do it seems like they always get good hands. Often times this type of player will also be a risky player. There is usually at least one extremely lucky person at the table. The only way to overcome this is through strategy.
 * Lucky

This type of player thinks they know how to play and is usually wrong. They are often cocky and unpredictable. They make decisions that aren't based on logic which makes it difficult to tell what they will do. Although they have very little talent they are hard to compete with because of their unpredictability.
 * Amateur

This type of player is the opposite of the bluffer, they usually only play hands that they think they can win, this makes them very predictable and easy to bluff. However when they do bluff it is often very hard to tell. A good poker player has the perfect blend of "Bluffer" and "Conservative". Conservative to the point where they do not play stupid, but they bluff enough to keep their opponents guessing.
 * Conservative

This type of player often coincides with an amateur player. They tend to take lots of risks and rely mainly on intuition. This means that when they win they win big, but most of the time they lose.
 * Risky

How to Bluff
The matter of bluffing is very complicated and depends greatly on what strategies your opponents practice. First of all when bluffing, you should put in just enough money to force the other players out but not too much to the point where your opponents know you are bluffing. If you bet too little, your opponents will call you and you will end up losing all the money you bet. if you bet too much you have the chance of your opponents thinking your bluffing. Also with a higher bluff you are putting more money at risk. The best times to bluff is when: 

1.You are playing with 4 or fewer players.

2.You are playing with conservative players.

3.After you have won several hands WITHOUT bluffing, if you are a conservative player it is easier to bluff because your opponents will be more likely to think you have something.

4. You are the last player to bet(Dealer) and everyone else checked.

5. On the river if no one has bet or if the pot is very small.

6. If you think someone else is bluffing, this is very effective, however, if your opponent actually does have something this will backfire.

Sometimes it is also effective to "slow play" a hand. this is a style of bluffing in which you make your opponents think you have something by betting in small increments as if you are trying to keep them in the game.

Slow Play
This is a method of playing in which you bet in small increments at each betting point in order to keep players in and ultimately win more money. You would use this method most of the time if you have a good hand that you are pretty sure will win. You can also use this method to bluff, but it is risky and should be used based on your prediction of your opponent's reaction. As with everything it is dependent on the people with whom you are playing. This method is often used with a small number of players, and with conservative players. Slow playing helps keep unsure opponents in the betting without scaring them out.

Advantages of Different Sized Tables
Small Tables(4 or less players)

On a small table it is easier to keep track of opponent's strategies and it is much easier to bluff. On the other hand, it is also harder to keep opponents in the game when you have a good hand. On this type of table you would slow play good hands and bluff big. When you have something on this size of table, it is a good idea to check in order to reduce suspicion that you have a good hand. This way you can allow your opponents to bet for you and you merely call and do not risk implying that you have a good hand.

Large Tables(5 or more players)

The main advantage of this type of table is that someone will usually call you when you bet. This is very good if you have a good hand. It means that you do not have to slow play but you can merely bet without having to worry about your opponents folding. In this way you can make a lot more money on your good hands. The downside to a big table is that the more people at the table, the harder it is to bluff. I would not recommend bluffing at all unless you manage to make the majority of the table fold either preflop or on the flop. You could also bluff if you think you are playing with more conservative player, but make sure you are the last player to bet so that you know whether or not someone has something. It is also a good idea to check on the flop so that you can figure out what your opponents may be trying to do. The better you get at poker, the easier it is to distinguish what a person has in their hand based on their strategy and betting technique.

Poker Equipment
If you are looking to spend a fortune you could consider buying the 7.5 million dollar set made by Geofrey Parker, which is currently the most expensive in the world. The other options are either clay or plastic chips with Bicycle or KEM playing cards. If you are just starting off, the plastic chips with standard Bicycle cards would be the best option. Many places sell plastic chips and they are often fairly cheap. Bicycle sells small boxed sets of 100 poker chips that include red, blue, and ivory chips. They also sell high quality cards for 2 to 3 dollars. If you want a slightly more expensive set, the ESPN official poker set features 2 decks of cards and clay chips. This will cost you more, but it is worth the quality. The cards in the ESPN set however, are not the greatest. I would recommend buying a deck of KEM playing cards to compliment your set. KEM is a brand under Bicycle. They provide cards for professional games across the country. The cards are known for their durability and finish.If you would like to know about any of these equipment pieces more extensively, the links are at the bottom


 * Parker set http://www.luxist.com/2011/03/11/worlds-most-expensive-poker-set-for-7-5-million/


 * Bicycle chips http://www.bicyclecards.com/product-page-pages-30.php?pid=24


 * Bicycle cards http://www.bicyclecards.com/

Online Poker
Online Poker is a whole new realm. There are two different kinds, for money, and for free. When you play for money, a lot of the strategies are the same as in regular poker. In contrast, free online poker is completely different. It is important to remember to follow the three rules and abide by the large table strategy. Online Poker cannot be based on facial reading therefore being able to gauge your opponents play style and strategy on his betting habits is crucial.

Free Poker
This type of poker is unpredictable. Most of the time you are dealing with risky players that do not mind taking chances and bluffing. Because there is no money involved many people do not take it seriously.