User:Terumi94/sandbox2

Dr. Haenn please review this. 11/9/17

Article 2 draft

''Hi Cuong, You'll see my comments below in italics. The paragraph seems a bit brief. Can you tell us more about this? Also have you identified an information gap on Wikipedia that you want to address? It seems that anime must have lots of coverage. Regards, Dr. Haenn''

Anime culture in the United States began as a niche community that had a grassroots foundation built by groups of fans on the local level. These groups tended to be small and were limited to their own relative communities until much later, when inter-connected entrepreneurs from Japan and the United States saw an opportunity for business through this new medium. Some of the earliest anime to air in the United States were Astro Boy, Speed Racer, and Gigantor, which gained popularity with many American audiences. The first anime fan club is thought to have formed during 1977 in Los Angeles, California as the Cartoon/Fantasy Organization (C/FO), which met monthly to watch newly aired anime. Over the next dozen years more communities formed around the shared interest of anime and these groups began to develop new social identities in accordance to what they saw as an overall interconnected community. This rise in popularity led to the founding of the United States' first anime import company[specify] in 1989, thus starting anime's widespread commercialization.

Draft 2
Anime culture in the United States began as a niche community that had a grassroots foundation built by groups of fans on the local level. These groups tended to be small and were limited to their own relative communities Does "limited to their own relative communities" mean "insular"? until much later, when (give explanation as to what may have helped anime culture grow in popularity, like the ease of access, Internet, getting featured on US TV shows, etc). Some of the earliest anime to air in the United States were Astro Boy, Speed Racer, and Gigantor, which gained popularity with many American audiences. ''When were these shows aired? Were they radio programs/'' The first anime fan club is thought to have formed during 1977 in Los Angeles, California as the Cartoon/Fantasy Organization (C/FO), which met monthly to watch newly aired anime. Over the next dozen years more communities "Clubs"? formed around the shared interest of anime and these groups began to develop new social identities in accordance to what they saw as an overall interconnected community.''The previous sentence is a run-on. Please amend. What were these new social identities? Did they have a name? Characteristic features?'' This rise in popularity led to the founding of the United States' first anime import company in 1989, thus starting anime's widespread commercialization. What was the name of the import company?


 * Hi ! This is very good so far - I've made some tweaks to the format so that it'd flow a little better. One of the main things I noticed is that the section could use some more sourcing, especially to back up some of the claims, such as the C/FO being the first fan club. I put "thought to have formed" for this, since it's the earliest known one - there may be one even earlier. Also, be careful of overall paragraph structure. You listed several anime as airing in the 60s, however the next sentence gives off the impression that anime didn't really get watched until the 70s, which contradicts this statement. I figured that you were likely referring to the consumption of anime in fan communities, so I tweaked this to specify that. Other than that, I've added some notes to the above content in bold and in the markup language (ie, the citation needed and specify tags), which you should be able to see when you hover your mouse over them. Let me know if you need more help!
 * On a side note, the username reminds me of the name Narumi, which is a character from the anime/manga series Spiral: The Bonds of Reasoning. It's a good series, so I recommend checking it out. Shalor (Wiki Ed) (talk) 20:45, 7 November 2017 (UTC)

Draft 3
Anime culture in the United States began as a niche community that had a grassroots foundation built by groups of fans on the local level. . Some of the earliest televised anime to air in the United States were Astro Boy, Speed Racer, and Gigantor, which gained popularity with many American audiences during the late 1960s. Small patches of isolated communities started to form around collective interest towards this new medium, which for some seemed reminiscent of familiar Disney visuals and Warner-Brothers narratives. One of these communities was the first anime fan club called the Cartoon/Fantasy Organization (C/FO), formed in Los Angeles, California during 1977; club actives involved monthly meets in order to watch newly aired anime. The early popularity was driven by fan-subtitled content and remained that way until much later, when inter-connected entrepreneurs from Japan and the United States saw an opportunity for business through this new medium. These business opportunities eventually led to the founding of Streamline Pictures, the United States' first anime import company in 1989, thus starting anime's widespread commercialization. Over the next dozen years, anime fans became more connected through fan-held conventions and the internet. These groups began to develop new social identities, centered around what they saw as an overall interconnected community.

A subculture began to grow around the United States revolving around people who identified with the social identity “Anime fan.” The strong imagined community built by the fandom since the earliest days was both the backbone and reason for the subculture’s growth. Today, anime has become almost universally recognized media in the United States, with early 2000's shows like Pokemon and Dragon Ball being household names.