User:Tgil89/Childhood schizophrenia/Jnsellers Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Tgil89


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Tgil89/Childhood_schizophrenia?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)

Evaluate the drafted changes
The second sentence added in fits nicely. Noting the severity of factors is a good choice, as many readers tend to self-diagnose from Google and Wikipedia. This could make the difference between "Having this event happen will probably cause issues" and "Having a severe or prolonged event can create issues".