User:TheReaderOne/Virtual reality game/Toaddoesnot Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

TheReaderOne


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:TheReaderOne/Virtual_reality_game?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Virtual reality game

Evaluate the drafted changes
I think that this is a great choice for an article to review because it is rated “C-class” and “High importance”, and have quite a significant amount of page views. There are a couple of typos like spaces before commas and also potential grammar mistakes. The content of the text can be edited as well because right now some sentences seem too specific for some companies and regions which is not necessarily important for the overall history of VR. The amount of references seems decent, and there is a good start for outlining the paragraphs to work with.

As for an addition to the article, I would separate a history section even more: pre-VR (before the 1990s), experimental VR (1990s-00s), first VR games (00s-2010s), consumer-ready hardware (2010s), modern VR (2022-present). I think that the first couple of sections can potentially benefit from the invention of the term “Virtual Reality” by Jaron Lanier (1989) and the invention of Virtual Reality Modeling Language (VRML), the prototype of modern VR (check out “OSMOSE” by Char Davies, 1994). The modern VR section can include concepts like full-body haptic feedback & motion capture tracking VR (VR suit), distribution channels like SteamVR, and VR social platforms like VRChat and Horizon Worlds by Meta. Maybe, some controversial aspects of VR such as motion sickness and sexual assault (VR groping) can be mentioned.

I also think that the article is lacking other uses of VR (such as simulations for aviation, healthcare, therapy, etc), and other branches of VR such as media art showcased in the museums. The starting point for the last can be an exhibition “The Unframed World” (2016) and the Art Production agency “Acute Art” which collaborates with artists like Marina Abramovic in the creation of VR. Creative instruments like Tilt Brush can be covered too together with VR development instruments.