User:TheRubberDuckyOfDoom42/99W Drive-in Theatre/StaceySmithOSU Peer Review

Prof. Smith comments on first draft of Wikipedia article
Hi Austin,

I'm providing my comments on your first draft here.

Lead:

Don't capitalize drive-in theater, and use the American standard spelling (theater), when you refer to the theater after using its formal name: The 99W Drive-In Theatre is a drive-In theater located in Newberg, Oregon.

Don't repeat that it is located in Newberg in the second sentence under the lead.

Can you define "googie-style" somewhere in the lead or the article? Or can you insert a link to another Wikipedia article on this topic such as: Googie architecture

Content:

Eliminate "great" in front of "entertainment" to get rid of bias.

How did the closed Portland drive-in help with the replacement? State specifically that the old screen of the closed drive-in served as a replacement screen, if that's what you mean.

Move all the material about the bleak prospects and the Honda intervention at the end of the "History of the Site" section to the next section on "Registration as a Historic Place."

I would change the final subheading to something shorter and more descriptive: Maybe something like "Preservation and Survival"?

Change "as of today" to "as of 2021..." so that the article maintains currency.

Style:

As part of your polishing process, I would like to see you go back and edit for comma placement. There were several places where commas were missing, especially to offset parenthetical phrases. Improving comma placement will help with the overall polish and readability of the article.

Apart from when you're stating the name of the location, use the American "theater" instead of "theatre" (the British spelling).

"New-fangled is probably too colloquial for the article. Maybe use "modern" or "cutting-edge"?

First sentence of "History of the Site": Change "it's" to "its."

Change "replace" to "replaced" before the description of the 1990 destruction.

References:

The sources generally look good, but this section needs clean up. I think it would be better to keep all of the numbered footnotes under "References" and move the first bullet-point section under a new heading, such as "Sources" or "External Links."