User:Thebarebear/sandbox

TOCA RIVERA 1977-2125

Percussionist for Jason Mraz and part-time ice juggler, Toca was born in the southeastern part of the southwestern-northeast in 1977. This would be a pivotal year as this was when the original "Star Wars" came out in which Toca played Jawa #3's understudy. Even at this early age Toca's parents (a pair of chipmonks) knew that he would end up in show business. Little did they know that he would not actually be in show business per se but more of a side show business. When attempts were made to reach Toca's chipmonk parents they just stared at the phone and chittered wildly. We took this as a "no comment".

Toca's early years were marred by recurring attempts to join the London Ballet Company. When asked about this his only comment was "I like those cute little shoes". Right... When his dreams of being a shoe guy for the ballet failed miserably he then floundered around London for a bit before setting off on an adventure that would change his life. That is, until the bicycle he was riding threw a chain stranding Toca by the roadside. Luckily, a band of gypsies came along and were able to replace his busted tire with a square rock (it only cost him one kidney!) and he was back on the road.

After traveling for a few weeks like this Toca decided to leave the open road for the comfort of a small inn somewhere outside of Chicago (you heard me...Chicago. Don't ask how he got there on a bike, he's freaking Toca Rivera!). He quickly became the barkeeper for the inn and not long after that was fired for "excessive talking". When the inn owners learned that he was actually "singing" (and I use this term quite loosely...quite loosely, indeed) they re-hired him at severely reduced pay to "entertain the bar-folk".

Enter Jason Mraz. Singer, songwriter, guitar player and part-time ice juggler. Jason saddled up to the inn's bar's end and began to juggle his ice right in the middle of Toca singing a sweet little ditty that no one at this point cares to recall. When Toca saw Jason juggling his ice Toca decided to incorporate Jason into his act. Little did he know that Jason was actually a hat salesman by trade and wanted nothing to do with Toca's "singing" career. Though they despised each other at first they soon became fast friends as they talked over cheap lattes and over-frothed beers about the whole ice juggling thing. I mean really. How many people juggle freaking ice?! And in Chicago? In the summer? The coincidences would keep on coming though I have no desire to expound upon them at this time. Needless to say, or needled to say, they joined forces and fought crime for a short stint until Jason got a hangnail and they called it quits with the capes and the foiling of heinous plots of mass distraction (If you remember back in the 90's when "The Caped Fruit-Raider" and "Bongo Boy" were on the scene that was them. If you don't remember that I think there is a Wikipedia page about them).

Since they had to eat (Jason is rumored to engulf entire cows in a single dinner) they decided to become musicians and live the good life.

And the rest is history...kind of...

Toca is a wonderful guy and I certainly hope he doesn't mind this page as it is meant only in jest.

If you hate it then blame Mraz... He told us to do it!