User:Thomas Hilder

Thomas Hilder is a god. He eats the flesh of fœtus and babies alike. He has been covered in fæces many times. There are some who have defæcated on him. He looks like a Greek goddess.

He wears thermals and jeans and sometimes a pair of green parachute pants; he smells like body odor and cheese. He embarks on epic bike journeys every week on his way to school. He has tactics not to get called on in math class. When he is supposed to be drawing squares, he draws the triangle.

Thomas Hilder is the most interesting man in the world.