User:Tiazjane/4B (movement)/Cliopentimento Peer Review

General info
Tiazjane (provide username)
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing:https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Tiazjane/4B_%28movement%29?veaction=edit&preload=Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):

Evaluate the drafted changes
This entry has a few pieces of good information, but it needs a great deal of work. There should be more clarity about the who, what, where, why, and how of this movement. The organization is also weak and needs a great deal of improvement.

LEAD: The lead section needs to explain where the 4B movement is located (we don't learn it's in Korea until later) and when it was founded.

When and how was the movement founded?

The "purpose" section is a bit confusing. Is this part of the lead? The lead should be more concise. Save some of this content for the body of the entry.

ORGANIZATION

This is a confusingly organized entry. You need to include the history more clearly of when, where, and how the organization was founded and by whom. Who were some of the Korean feminists who started this movement? You write that it's young "digital feminists" but who were some of the first? And what were the first digital actions that launched it? The entry doesn't include the names of any activists. It says "she" in one sentence but there's no information about who this refers to.

There is a section on digital organizing, but no explanation

The entry doesn't explain how these protests occurred. Are they only digital and if they're digital, how are they digitaly--through social media? Are they in the streets?

The "Birth Rate in Korea" section bears little connection to the rest of the entry and the first sentence of it is not grammatically correct.

Please see me if you are confused about this feedback or need help. KM

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