User:Tikomkheidze/Black maternal mortality in the United States/Mbh90 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Tikomkheidze, Wp.tamiya.georgetown2022


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Tikomkheidze/Black_maternal_mortality_in_the_United_States?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Black maternal mortality in the United States

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

Strengths of the revision

Overall, I thought your revision was really well done and thorough, and I think the way you restructured and rewrote a lot of the content made it much clearer and easier to follow. In the introduction, I really like how you broke up the paragraphs to make it more clear to read, and I appreciated that you included a discussion of the social determinants of health as a root cause for the disparities in maternal mortality across racial and ethnic groups. Additionally, I thought how you restructured the Preventions section into two subsections was really smart, and I liked the distinction between medical-centered and institutional reforms. Below are some suggested changes that I have, but I thought the revision was really great!

Suggested changes


 * In the introduction, you should include a citation for the lines "However, there are stark differences in maternal mortality rates for Black American women versus American Indian, Alaska Native, and White American women. Between 1897 and 2016, the maternal mortality rates in the United States more than doubled, while the maternal mortality rates worldwide had seen an overall decrease." I also think it would be helpful to include statistics regarding the disparities between maternal mortality across race/ethnic groups to really illustrate the differences that are present, and I was wondering if there was a reason you specifically only chose to highlight American Indian, Alaska Native, and White American women and not Asian American and Hispanic/Latinx women as well.
 * I think that the Medical Measures subsection could use a bit more detail from the sources that you chose, specifically where you write that "policies need to be implemented that focus on the expansion and maintenance of the care and coverage." I also think this section could possibly benefit from a discussion of diversity in healthcare and the need for and impact of more Black healthcare providers on maternal mortality rates for the community.
 * In the Institutional Measures subsection, I would include an explanation of how implicit bias contributes to maternal mortality (as well as a citation of some studies, such as one discussing the underestimation of pain maybe?) to support your other study about the importance of implicit bias training. I would also elaborate on what you mean by "deliberately addressing racism, both within and outside of the medical field" as a solution to reducing maternal mortality rates and maybe provide some examples of what that exactly looks like within healthcare settings.