User:Tinseldeaconpo/Alison Loader/Tropical chair Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

user: tinseldeaconpo


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Tinseldeaconpo/Alison Loader
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)

Images and Media
-I think that adding an image can make your page more aesthetic and inviting.

-Perhaps a description under it as well. If you want me to help you with that I definitely don't mind.

Organization
- The information that you have added is quite objective.

- I think maybe you can add headings because there is too much information in the top biography.

- For headings it could be separated into categories: Film category or animation category, career, early life..(It's easier that way and visually more clear. )

- When you mentioned Showa Shinzan, Making it a subheading can be confusing for a lot of people. Instead, you can put "Film" or 'Animation". The category or the genre is more direct. I mostly check other wikipedia pages to get an inspiration for the layout of my own page and see what makes sense to put as a Subheading or Heading. Maybe you can check other artists and find that inspiration.

- Mostly the beginning of a wikipedia page tells the essential information about a certain person or topic. You can just mention the most important and general information about Alison Reiko Loader, and leave the details underneath the introduction.

Sources and References
- There are a variety of sources and I think that's good. If you can add more that would better of course.

- For the last sentence that you mentioned which ends with 'Computation arts', I don't see the source that follows it. If you can add it that would be great.

Tone and Balance
-The language looks neutral.

-When you said 'It is typical of her work", it sounds like an assumption in my opinion. If you can replace it with a more neutral sentence.

Overall Impressions
-I personally think its very informative, you have provided very relevant sources.

-There could be more focus on the organization of your information, it feels a bit messy and condensed. Adding headings and sudbeahdings and making the information equality distributed, would be perfect.

-Great work and it honestly looks really interesting.