User:Tmitfc/Twentieth Dynasty of Egypt/Chrisad88 Peer Review

General info
Tmitfc
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing:User:Tmitfc/Twentieth Dynasty of Egypt
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):Twentieth Dynasty of Egypt

Evaluate the drafted changes
Lead Section

I think that the lead section could provide a bit more of an overview of the 20th dynasty in both this draft and the original article. I liked the removal of the content from the original article, however I think you are missing a lot of important information. I also don’t see any sources cited with your sentence about the Sea peoples.

Article Structure

As you have not really made any structural changes to the article, I don’t have much to say in this section. I think that the original article’s structure is very logical so I would recommend leaving it be. I also do not understand where your section under “article body” would go in the article, but it appears to resemble the Background section of the original article. If this is the case, I would argue that this overview of the 20th century would be better in the lead section of the article. The Background section is usually meant to give readers information about the events that led up to the establishment of the dynasty, not events that occured afterwards.

Coverage balance

I think that more attention could be paid to the section of the article about Setnakhte, as it is rather empty in the original article. Other than that I think that it could be beneficial to look into editing later parts of the article.

Sources

I would highly reccomend using more sources in your additions to this article! I noticed that the only two sources you listed were not apart of our course readings, the Van De Mieroop book is an excellent source that can help you with your lead and article body.