User:Tmzyang/Deng Jiaxian/Noneill2004!! Peer Review

General info
Tmzyang
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing:https://dashboard.wikiedu.org/courses/Skidmore_College/Physics_and_Society_(Spring_2024)/articles/edited?showArticle=666913916
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):Deng Jiaxian

Evaluate the drafted changes
The additions to this article were substantial, the early life section and career section were expanded a lot and the publication section looks like it was completely added. The career and early life sections contain a lot of detail, I feel they cover enough if not more than enough information about Deng Jiaxian. The information added is relevant and well written, it did not really leave me asking questions or wondering where more information would be.

The only thing that I find to be interesting, which could just be an organizational choice, was separating early life and personal life by the career and publication sections. I feel that maybe flow wise it would make more sense to keep those sections closer together, or at least move publications more to the bottom of the article.

The only other thing I would suggest it maybe a more monotone author voice, if that makes any sense. I had a sense of support, or importance coming through from the article which may be seen as bias. I understand he may have been important but I feel that talking about his accomplishments in such a way may persuade people rather than just inform.