User:Tuk82837/Deafness in the Democratic Republic of the Congo (DRC)/AlyssaB22 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

(Tuk82837)


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Tuk82837/Deafness in the Democratic Republic of the Congo (DRC)


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

Language Emergence
Citations need to be added in this section to show that the information provided is factual.

I think you did a great job transitioning from the languages spoken to the sign languages used.

I think maybe the sentence about Foster and the 32 deaf schools would be better suited in the primary and secondary education.

Significant Organizations
Citations need to be added in this section.

I liked the points you made about the organizations leadership and how that affects the impact it has on the community.

I know you mentioned that the organizations did not have websites, but maybe see if you could find any other articles that describe the organizations in a bit more detail.

I would see if you can find another organization to add here to make the section stronger.

If there is a lack of deaf organizations explain it in this section or use the information about the hearing individuals leading the organizations as proof that deaf organizations are lacking in DRC.

Human Rights
Citations need to be added to this section.

There were a few sentences that seemed less neutral and more persuasive so maybe take another look and make some tweaks.

The information about the text messaging ban was great to talk about because I'm sure this had a major impact on the deaf community in the DRC.

Other Notes
I wasn't able to access the main article but was able to access the sandbox draft. Overall I thought the information was good and with a few adjustments and the addition of citations/reference page the article will be great!