User:Tygodin17/Pepsodent/Dmosh75 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

(Tygodin17)


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Tygodin17/Pepsodent


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Pepsodent

Evaluate the drafted changes

 * The first sentence in the History section seems grammatically awkward.
 * There are no citations for the changes proposed in that section.
 * Your changes to the advertising section will provide a major improvement to the quality of the original page. I
 * believe it would be odd to add an entire "inventions of toothpaste" section only to add one line. I would at least consider fitting this addition into a preexisting section such as history or transforming this section into a complete paragraph.
 * By itself, I'm not sure the "Why do we Need Toothpaste?" section is relevant to the original page.