User:Ubwpro

AN UNKNOWN SPORT: UNDERWATER BASKET WEAVING

A Professional's Personal Account: Ashley Martin

"Underwater Basket Weaving is the underground and otherwise unknown upcoming professional sport of the twenty-first century. With Nearly three thousand professional competitors in the United States alone, it is growing slowly but steadily - increasing in fame, popularity, and incoming overall funds. When observed with proper intent to enjoy, UBW competitions are one of the most riveting activities I have, in my good fortune, ever seen."

-Shawnee Stevenson

Ashley Martin: Professional Underwater Basket Weaver (UBW); Active 2009-2014; Team Type: Men and Women's Division

Teammates: Shawnee Stevenson, Tiffany Rose, Lauren Cothren, Michael David, Daniel Orin, Randy Crate, Bent Vlatinam

Team Positions: History: The first known occurrence of underwater basket weaving was recorded in 1986, making it a fairly new sport not only in the United States but all around the globe.
 * 1) Ashley Martin - Team Captain, Point
 * 2) Shawnee Stevenson - Braker
 * 3) Tiffany Rose - Stamper B
 * 4) Lauren Cothren - Gripper, Substitute Braker
 * 5) Michael David - Sweeper, Go Between
 * 6) Daniel Orin - Stamper A
 * 7) Randy Crate - Relief
 * 8) Bent Vlatinam - Relief
 * Point: The Point teammate set the foundation for each basket being woven during a round/competition. After the Sweeper delivers the initial supplies, the Point weaves the base and passes the foundation to the stampers. When all of the foundations/bases have been woven, the Point assumes the position of a Stamper until the end of the round.
 * Braker: Traditionally, the Braker adds the fine weaving to the basket in order to ensure stability. When the Stampers finish a basket, they hand it off the the Braker (named for being that last in the round to become active) who secures each basket at the end of the round, and in turn before inspection.
 * Stamper A,B: The Stampers complete all of the work involved in weaving the baskets that occurs in between the foundation (Point) and the fine secure weaving (Braker).
 * Gripper: The Grippers job is to grip fellow teammates in order to keep them stationary while they accomplish tasks. They will move around and secure different teammates at different points in the competition.
 * Sweeper: The Sweeper's job is to swim from station to station bringing needed supplies to their fellow teammates. They can also evaluate the current efficiency rate of the teammates and flag for Relief if need be. They are also responsible for starting and stopping the time for each round with the assistance of the ref on duty.
 * Relief: The Relief's sole job is to be at least sufficient in all aspects of the game (with the exception of point) in order to REPLACE, RECOVER, REPEAT (The three R's of Relief) when a teammate signals for a break, for air, or for an emergency or injury. They should posses the skills required to 'tap in', assess the situation of the previous teammate, recover and continue the project or current step of the weaving process, exit the game, and repeat the process when necessary. In many aspects they are, alongside the team captain, the backbone of the team.

Professional's Take (Interview Questions and Answers):

Q: How long have you been a professional UBW?

A: I started UBW in high school, but only became a professional in 2009 when I was approached by a recreational scout (you couldn't be paid for playing back then), and that was when I started participating in official competitions. I ended my professional career for now in 2014, but just between you and me I have considered returning to the sport as of late.

Q: What water is best for weaving?

A: We actually hold competitions in almost any kind of water you could come up with. We have saltwater competitions in the ocean, freshwater, and my favorite and most common is the classic chlorinated pool water. Ocean water is terrible to film in, and somewhat hinders your vision in competitions. your best time in the ocean water will always be longer than your time in chlorinated water.

Q: Does the depth of the water affect your ability to perform?

A: We try not to go any lower than twenty or thirty feet, depending on what is available for competition, but my team did train at fairly low depths once or twice and the popping ears are killers afterwards. Other than that it really doesn't make that much of a difference for a trained professional other than sometimes it is distracting to think about while you are trying to weave.

Q: What was the biggest success in your career?

A: My biggest accomplishment was definitely trying out for the 2012 Summer Olympics. My team actually qualified, however, unfortunately, the UBW segments were not aired as a result of other events running longer (combined with the low demand of the sport).

Q: How long do UBW Meets usually run?

A: Well, in a competition you have to make twelve baskets that pass inspection, so you might be making more than that and not have some baskets qualify. On average, each team has to make fifteen baskets per meet. So, depending on how efficient your team is, you could have a running time of anywhere from an hour to and hour and a half.

Q: What kinds of baskets do you weave in a typical Meet?

A: Well, it actually varies from meet to meet. There are even specialty meets where certain nontraditional baskets are required. There are even freestyle meets from time to time, but they are rarer because it's harder to judge a basket from one category against a basket from another. In a "typical" competition, you have to make three standard baskets, which is a rounded bottom with one handle. Other than that you have to make four two-handled baskets, two covered baskets, and two cornucopia styled baskets. the final basket is always a team choice basket, or specialty basket.

Q: How does this sport affect you socially?

A: At first, I was more popular than I had ever been. I was attending every party on the books. But eventually the fame just got to be way too much. The paparazzi were everywhere. I t was rough, and I eventually had to move to a new town where I was lesser known. I have gone to immeasurable lengths to keep this part of my life a secret from my new friends, coworkers, and community. To me it is so important to avoid repeating any of the incidents that occurred in my prior town - especially the ruthless trash talk and slander that went on between rival team's fans.

Q: How do you keep the reeds moist?

A: I do not have to words to answer that.

Q: Are teams civil to one another at Meets? What about outside of competitions?

A: There is an extremely high and intense standard in regards to the code of conduct expected for teams and players competing in the UBW. I have yet to come into contact with any player who has let their guard down and broken their sworn oath to the code of conduct required of this sport. Each and every member of the UBW is one of the most stand-up citizens you could ever meet. The fans, though [pause] [sigh] the fans are pretty ruthless. I don't want to talk about it.

Q: How ruthless are the fans?

A: No comment

Q: Do you make enough money to sustain yourself and your family, or do you need a second job?

A: I actually make bank, but in my new community I have to keep up appearances as a productive member of the small society there. I do have a job for that purpose, yes, even though I am still heavily reaping the benefits of my secret profession.

Q: Do you have anything you want to say to your fanbase?

A: To quote a song I relate to in these trying times: "My name is "no," my number is "no," my sign is "no." You need to let it go" Please, but seriously, stop following me. Please.

Common Specialty rounds of Under Water Basket Weaving:

- Running water: Under water basket weaving

- Synchronized under water basket weaving

- Team mix under water basket weaving

- Frozen-over pond under water basket weaving

- Bacterially infested water: Under water basket weaving

- Ocean water: Under water basket weaving

- No Oxygen provided: Under water basket weaving

- Pick your own reeds: underwater basket weaving

- Lava: Under lava basket weaving

- Hot springs: boiling water underwater basket weaving

- Koolaid: Underwater basket weaving

- Threatening predators (piranhas, sharks, electric eels, leeches, water snakes. etc.): Underwater basket weaving

- Syrup: Canadian underwater basket weaving

Other Extreme Basket Weaving Sports:

Bull Riding: Basket Weaving

Mountain Climbing: Basket Weaving

Parachute/Skydiving: Basket Weaving

Parkour: Basket Weaving

Astronaut: Space weaving

Obstacle Course: Basket Weaving

Tightrope Walking: Basket Weaving

Mountain Biking: Basket Weaving

Snowboarding: Basket Weaving

Rock climbing: Basket Weaving

Hand Gliding: Basket Weaving

Apocalyptic Basket Weaving (bi-annual competition)

Alone in the desert for three days where you have to harvest your own sticks and find your own water supply and food and drinking water source to make a basket big enough to survive in a ward off predators while a plan onlooks on your progress and refuses to interfere NO MATTER WHAT: Basket Weaving

Horizontal Basket Weaving