User:Ugotstobefunking

Fictitious character in the book A Time to Forget

Life matters not was a quote that would forever pervade in Ugotstobefunking's life. Born to a young Armenian couple in the late 70s, ugotstobefunking would develop into a polymath sometime in his late 20s. Earning a double BS from the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, as well as an MD from The Johns' Hopkins school prior to his 22nd birthday, ugotstobefunking would grow to reknown fame.

early accomplishments Solving most of the Millennium Prize Problems set forth by the Clay Institute, including the famed Riemann Hypothesis while drunk and devilish one autumn night, as well as Poincares Conjecture, P versus NP and Navier-Stokes existence and smoothness earned him mathematical recognition by age 25. Other contributions would be in theoretical physics, for which he'd win the Nobel Prize 5 consecutive years, as well as solving several problems in medicine for which he'd win the Nobel Prize in Medicine for two consecutive years.

his 30s Falling into a deep depression sometime late in his 20s, having lost his wife, ugotstobefunking would not accomplish much, other than continuing to blast through complex mathematical problems, mainly the solving of Yang–Mills existence and mass gap, The Hodge conjecture and The Birch and Swinnerton-Dyer conjecture. Sometime in his late 30s, ugotstobefunking would be stumped by a complex problem in Linear Differential Combinatorics, and would abandon theoretical mathematics and theoretical physics.

Life at 40 Settling to a comfy chair as lead professor at Princeton University, ugotstobefunking took a job teaching Combinatorics to graduate students. Sometime in his 4th year teaching, he would have a mental lapse, in which he began furiously scribbling jumbled notation on one of his courses. Students knew not what was the meaning of the notes, but aptly jotted them down. Faculty members would come check the work done by ugotstobefunking, as noted by a graduate student present during the lapse. The work being dense, as was ugotstobefunking's usual work place, was hardly understood by the Princeton faculty, and members of The Clay Insitute, Stanford University and the Massachusetts Institute of Technology were called in for further analysis of the work. Ugotstobefunking's class was cancelled indefinitely and the grad students seeking PhDs were dismissed at this time.

50s 10 years had lapsed since ugotstobefunking dropped his charge as lead mathematician at Princeton University, and since then only slight advancements had been made in understanding his mathematics, but a vague understanding of the importance of his work was being debated. Regardless of his mathematical prowess, he'd lose mathematical credibility, despite having solved all of Clay Institute's mathematics problems. After his mental errata since the lapse, the professor would spend his time in bed, speaking "to gods, to the heavens and at walls," as one worried family member would note. Little work was accomplished during this period, which would last thirty-three years.

80s and his death One night, after the long spell of silence and isolation, the professor would awaken sometime in midnight, as a faculty member would recall, and go to a large window at the head of his mansion. Picking up a felt-tip marker, the professor would scribble a few equations, and at resolution, would add, "η ζωή πειράζει όχι," or "life matters not."