User:Utebug3000/Abbas Jamil

Abbas Jamil is a mackem mobile phone salesman, philosopher, author and lothario known mainly for his work with injured sea life.

Although his place of birth is unknown it is rumoured to be Bermuda, Pakistan, Germany and Zanzibar.

He first came to notoriety after works of his on the history of Sunderland Football Club were translated from panjabi to German in the late 70's.

After appearing on a German television show "Wie viel wissen Sie über die Beatles?" (How much do you know about The Beatles?) an english journalist studying in Hamburg at the time recognised his name. Being a Sunderland fan the journalist became intrigued by the wide palate of talent displayed by Mr Jamil and decided to investigate his story.

Little is written in recorded history and his exact age is unknown although it is assumed to be around 1977.

Upon the journalists' investigation it was discovered that Abbas Jamil was now working in a bar in Scleswig-Holstein, where he had been working saving injured seals in the area. A huge oil spill occured there and Abbas Jamil shot to local fame after he was photographed carrying to badly hurt seal's on his shoulders on a beach. The photograph became extremely popular locally and Abbas Jamil was able to set up a seal home on the coast and used his experiences to write the critically acclaimed "Die Dichtung Whisperer" (The Seal Whisperer)

After spending time searching for where exactly man discovered fire he returned to Germany to work as a carpet fitter where he published further work, firstly a semi autobiographical work on the art of attracting Asian women and secondly on money management, infamously there are many that believe his works influence on the then Bank of Deutschland Chief Executive contributed to the devaluing and eventual collapse of the Deutsche mark.

His current location and age are unknown although it is rumoured he is living somewhere in the UK. He is occasionally seen at The Stadium of Light on matchdays and has been reported to have been seen in a number of Wiliiam Hill's.