User:Valeriemahoneya/User:Ibrahim Saleh Alsannat/Joseph Galarza/Valeriemahoneya Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Ibrahim Saleh Alsannat


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Ibrahim Saleh Alsannat/Joseph Galarza


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * No current version of a Joseph Galarza page.

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

Lead
The lead is a bit weak, but could be strengthened by moving information about the ARTETOLTECAYOTL partnership and his date of starting work in 1995 up into the lead section, and then providing more specific information in the body.

Content
All of the content included is relevant and seems to be up to date. However there's is a lot of information missing. The article could use information about the artist's relevant works, and the other members of his collaborative work and a list of works they have created and where they were shown. Add information about galleries and any permanent installments. Expand upon his community and anti-gang work. Explain how his work helps prevent gang affiliation in young people and why the artist considers it important. Explain how he addresses history and helping fight racism.

Tone and Balance
The article is too opinionated, it is not neutral. Phrasing like, "in an area called," and, "deviant young persons," should be revised. Simplify, and state that he grew up in El Sereno in Los Angeles. Simplify, talking about his community work to gang prevention. The word, "so-called," should be removed to create a neutral tone; call modern art modern art.

Sources and References
I hope that Ibrahim has been collecting the sources for their info outside of the current Wiki pages. I can not make any more specific critiques of sources because there are none available to me.

Organization
I can see the information is organized into a lead, a section on his organizations, and a section on his motivations and I think that works well. However, none of the sections have specific enough information yet. These sections should be sub headed with appropriate titles. I think this article would also benefit from reference to specific work from the artists, or an entire new section dedicated to notable works and/or galleries.

Images and Media
The article currently contains no images or media. Consider sourcing and photograph of the artist and a photograph of at least one of his pieces of work.

Overall Impression
The article has a decent start, but it really needs specific and sourced information. Expand upon the style information and materials he specializes in with specific examples of work. Add information about his affiliated organizations, his works, and his motivations.