User:Vincentooi808/Educational technology/Alyssagpp Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Vincentooi808


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Vincentooi808/Educational_technology?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)

Evaluate the drafted changes
Hi Vincent,

This is another very fleshed out article! I have a lot of similar comments with this one as I did with your blended learning article, especially in regards to how you are citing texts. I think you should definitely check in with Professor Talwalker about referring to the names of the authors of the articles in text, or if you should just be purely delivering the information and them citing them in text.

Another comment I had with the other article as well was your essay-like tone- you use a lot of transition words like "hence" and "however" that are more story-telling like that I think you could cut out. I think it would help to clarify your tone as more of an encyclopedic voice.

I am also curious about some of the repeating / overlapping content you have between the two articles- one thing I think you could do is hyperlink one article to the other, so readers can read both of your articles if they are interested specifically in either of these two topics.

I really liked that you hyperlinked some of the organizations, super helpful to navigate towards them and learn more about it!

I think you are missing some citations in certain areas but other than that it looks good! Keep up the good work!

-Alyssa