User:Vinceo0316/Weight loss coaching/AliviahLelii Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Vinceo0316


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Vinceo0316/Weight loss coaching


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Weight loss coaching

Lead
Yes, the lead has been updated by my peer.

Yes, the lead contains a strong beginning sentence that allows readers to get a concise and quick understanding of weight loss coaching.

There are unfortunately not many sections in this article to summarize, advice to my peer would be to ADD SECTIONS like training styles and types. Different diet types (keto, Mediterranean, etc.)

No, the lead does not provide information that is not in the article.

The lead is concise and contains all important and necessary information.

Content
Yes, the new content added is relevant to the topic.

Yes, the content added is up to date.

Yes, there is some content missing. This is a very small article that has a lot of possible information to be added, as I previously said. There is however no content that simply does not belong.

No, this article does not represent an equity gap.

Tone and Balance
I am not going to individually answer each question because this article is entirely unbiased and only states facts.

Sources and Information
Yes, all new content is backed by reliable sources.

Yes, content does accurately reflect what the source says, but is not word for word unless quoted (good work on this one!)

Yes, the sources are thorough and reflect knowledge of this topic.

Yes, the sources are current.

I cannot confidently say the sources are written by diverse people or any important historical figures. This could possibly use some work, however weight loss coaching does not have a long history.

Yes, I would suggest to my peer to look into some more medically reliable sources (WHO, CDC, etc.) to find information on obesity, weight and relation to health, disease and why this is prevention, etc..

Yes, I checked several links and they all worked.

Organization
Yes, the added content is concise and clear.

Yes, the added content seems to have a couple of grammatical errors. "Based upon the relationship between weight and attitude and the mind body relationship, coaching is an holistic approach." Should instead look more like "Based upon the relationship between weight and attitude, as well as the mind to body relationship, coaching is considered a holistic approach."

I would also change the title "Early Days" to something more simple or clear such as "History" or "The History of Weight Loss Coaching".

Yes, the content is well-organized and broken down into proper sections that make sense for the article.

Images and Media
The answer to all of these questions is no because there are no pictures or media in the present article. Some main advice that I would give my peer is to add one or two photos of what weight loss coaching looks like, a news article on it, etc..

Overall Impressions and Closing Thoughts
Yes, the overall content of the article has been improved by the edits made by my peer. I would definitely say that the article is much more complete.

Some of the strengths of the added content are:

Under the section "Early days" a lot of strong information was added. This section was very small and empty and my peer added lots of good and relevant information.

The main thing that could be improved in this article is simply adding more information. Adding additional sections and more information to the existing sections.