User:VivecaFitz/Eumachia/Demilynnn Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Avamilazzo


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://docs.google.com/document/d/13eW0HqmgfKGo4B4Efz9E1d6Ua9Y6o68UlGU9e10a8hU/edit#heading=h.ngzob7nlkljp


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Eumachia

Evaluate the drafted changes
The last sentence written in the second paragraph about the statue dedicated to Eumachia would have better clarity if it was split up into two sentences. Also, the part that says "showing that she was an established woman of Italian town elites of the distinguished women of Roman italy" is unclear and may be a little wordy, it would be good to make it more concise. Also, in the paragraph about the statue, it may be better to add context as to why we should assume that all benefactors were recognized with such a statue, or to not make it such a definitive statement. Overall, try to focus on ensuring that you are consistently writing in third person.