User:WUSTLWikiWarrior/Giuseppe Musolino/ReimyLi Peer Review

General info
WUSTLWikiWarrior (Justin)
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:WUSTLWikiWarrior/Giuseppe_Musolino?veaction=edit&preload=Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template:
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Giuseppe Musolino
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Giuseppe_Musolino&oldid=1186542484 (old version, prior to Justin's edits)

Lead
The lead has been properly updated to reflect the changes added in the draft, and it is concise. One change I would make is perhaps including the words "first" and "second" when referring to the trials to make it easier to connect to the body of the article.

Tone and Balance
The content is relatively balanced apart from the "Second Trial and Imprisonment" section, which is much longer compared to the rest of the article. Perhaps there is a way to make it more concise or split up the section into sub-sections? Maybe split up the section into "Second Trial" and "Imprisonment".

The tone is neutral throughout.

Organization
Most of the content is concise, clear, and easy to read. The section on his second trial could (possibly) be made more concise. There is a tendency to use semicolons in that section, with two in almost each paragraph. These connected sentences could be turned into one shorter sentence.

Content is well organized! There is some odd formatting regarding spacing here and there, but that can be easily fixed.

For New Articles Only
Meets the Notability requirements, has an exhaustive list of sources, and is formatted properly. Also includes working links!

Overall impressions
The content added has improved the detail and depth of the article. The reader gets a better understanding of Giuseppe Musolino, including his motivations, behavior, and background story.

Making the section on the second trial and imprisonment more concise would help with readability, but overall the content flows nicely and is coherent.

Some more context on what was happening in Calabria at the time would help us understand why the peasants sympathized with him.

Adding images and media would help with locating Calabria, Gerace, etc.

Lead Peer Review
- Im not really sure how writing an article that already exists works, but I would probably write your own introductory sentence for the lead in addition to the preexisting content.

Early Life
- I would probably include the birthday here again just as some introductory information.

- Good use of citations

Initial Crimes and First Trial
- This is kind of technical, but I would change up the structure of the sentence where Musolino was stabbed. It seemed a little bit confusing for me.

- Implying that Musolino's conviction was corrupt seems to be taking a stance on what actually happened. I would try to word things a little softer just to make sure you aren't taking an argumentative position that the trial was unfair. Maybe point out potential biases in the sources used, or use wording like "some observers believed the conviction to be based on circumstantial evidence." You could list the objective information first, (like Musolino's lawyers not being able to call witnesses, etc), then say how these events led some observers to believe the conviction of Musolino was corrupt.

Escape from Prison
- I thought this section was highly interesting and really enjoyed reading it. It filled in the major gaps the other article seemed to be missing.

Second Trial and Imprisonment
- This section had a lot of good information and used the citations very well

- You could maybe use some of the secondary sources we read for class to talk about the history of the relationship between mental illness and criminality. You seem to have enough sources/information though, so you may not really need it.

Musolino as a Legend
- Again, I don't really know how to work with a preexisting article, but adding your own section about the image of Musolino may be a good idea.