User:WaterDweller

"As a young piano student, Clara Haskill was riding on a train with a friend. They discussed various famous pianists, and Clara said that Edwin Fischer played many wrong notes.  They did not know that Fischer was sitting in the next compartment and apparently overheard their conversation.  When they all got out, Fischer asked with a big smile if the two young women could help him lift his bag from the luggage rack.  He said, 'It is very heavy, it is full of all my wrong notes.'"

"When the United States Congress passed stricter laws about automobile air pollution, the Japanese car manufacturers immediately called a conference of their top engineers to discuss how best to meet the new standards. And the American car manufacturers in Detroit immediately called a conference of their top lawyers to discuss how best to fight the new standards."

"At an international banquet with many dignitaries from around the world, there was also a Chinese guest. After serving the soup, the waiter tried to strike some conversation with him and asked, imitating Pin‑Yin English, "Liky soupy?"  The Chinese nodded politely.  After a plate of fish, the waiter asked, "Liky fishy?" and the Chinese man again nodded approvingly.  After dinner, the Chinese man rose and gave a 20‑minute speech without using notes in perfect English, since he had studied at Oxford.  After his speech, he turned to the waiter and asked, 'Liky speechy?'"

Someone asked Albert Einstein at a party: "Oh, you are Albert Einstein, could you please explain me your relativity theory in three or four sentences?" Einstein thought for a while, then he said, "I am very sorry, it is not really possible to explain relativity theory so quickly, but I will at least try to explain you why not. Once I went for a walk with a blind man on a warm summer afternoon.  After a while we came to a restaurant and sat down at a table.  I asked him, 'Would you like a glass of milk?'  'I know what a glass is,' the blind man said, 'but what is milk?'  'Milk is a white fluid,' I replied.  'Aha, I know what a fluid is,' he said, 'but what is white?'  'White is the color of swans,' I explained to him.  'I know what a color is, but what are swans?'  'Swans are big birds with a crooked neck.'  'Oh, birds,' the man exclaimed, 'I have heard of birds.  And what is crooked?'  I took his arm, stretched it and said, 'This is straight,' then I bent it and said, 'and this is crooked.'  The man's face turned into a happy smile and he said, 'Now I finally know what milk is.'"