User:Weedsandherbsandflowers/Homer Shorebird Festival/Englishmademedoit Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Weedsandherbsandflowers


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:Weedsandherbsandflowers/Homer, Alaska


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Homer, Alaska

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

You're edit to the lead section for Homer, Alaska is great. I like how you edited it to flow better, and you added in updated information.

The content you've added is relevant to the article, neutral, and reflective to the resources.

Your contribution of the Kachemak Bay Shorebird Festival is great. It's to the point and informative. The media image is wonderful, too, as it reflects shore birds. I would recommend putting a comma after "Today" for the second sentence of the first paragraph. My second recommendation: For the second paragraph, the first sentence sounds a little redundant. "In 2020, the festival was held entirely virtually due to the COVID-19 pandemic and all presentations, speeches, and events were conducted virtually." You've listed it being virtually twice, so maybe edit that bit to flow better? The second sentence, after the first sentence, does a good job of flowing with the in person and virtual components.

Other than those two minor edits, everything else looks great. I did see you were signed up on the Google Doc for a consultation with Professor Cason about the length of your contribution to the Homer Article. I wonder if there's any information about what else happens at the shorebird festival? Are there food trucks, music? Are there discussions or forums held regarding migrations/different birds in the area that could be listed as a part of the festival experience? Is there a parade? Just some things I thought of, it maybe helpful or it may not. Good luck!