User:Wikibrim/Elizabeth R. Cole/Breanna4097 Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Wikibrim

Link to draft you're reviewing

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Wikibrim/Elizabeth_R._Cole?preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)

Evaluate the drafted changes
Hello! I think what have here is looking pretty good and I am glad that she is getting some recognition! You have a lot of sources and it seems like you have pretty much everything sourced.

My only advice are just some things that could make your article sound more encyclopedia like and concise. For example, instead of saying "Cole's research places an emphasis on the intersectionality of certain socially constructed identities.." You could say Cole researches the intersectionality of certain..." It's definitely not bad the way you have it written, but if you were looking for ways to shorten your sentences, you could do that.

Similarly, in the Education and Career Section, I think it would help to understand her education/ get a quick overview if the sentences had a similar format. For example: In 1986, Cole graduated with her Bachelor of Arts in Psychology from Boston University. Later, in 1991 she received masters...". Repeating the degree she received was kind of hard to follow.

You did a great job though and I feel like I am grasping at straws trying to give you advice! Good luck!