User:Wikimedes/sandbox/humor under construction

Userbox ideas
 Userbox  This user has no idea how to create a userbox. You’re stuck with this bland text. TLDR This user’s discussion contributions are often too long to read. Unless you really need to know the gory details, you are strongly encouraged to stop reading after the first paragraph. Blah blah, blah blah, blah blah. English Variety Comprehension (I’m at level 4) Level 0 This user only understands precise and grammatically correct English in the user’s native accent, vocabulary, and spelling. Level 1 This user sometimes understands English spoken in accents or written in varieties other than his own. To be on the safe side, you’d better explain whether you’re talking about footwear or the rear external compartment of a car. Level 2 This reader sometimes understands English spoken in non-native accents or written in non-standard grammar or usage. You may have to waste a lot of time explaining things to him. Level 3 This user usually understands different accents and reasonable attempts at written English. Be kind and take the time to write as intelligibly as you can. Level 4 This user understands almost every accent he encounters. He also does a fair job of interpreting written gobbledygook. Discussions often require precise expression and understanding, so this user reserves the right to ask for clarification. Level 5 This user has professionally conducted academic studies of different accents, pidgins, and creoles. Just blurt something out – he has a fair chance of reading your mind.

Plain English This user thought it was fun to use dollar words to describe nickel concepts in Junior High School, but now tries to converse more intelligibly write in plain English. Plain English This user used to think it was fun to use dollar words to describe nickel concepts, but now tries to converse more intelligibly write in plain English.

Homonym Confusion This user often rights writes the wrong homonym and then is horrified to read what he has written. Fortunately, he is nearly always able to write right the wrong on the preview page.

DGAF If you find me taking things too seriously, please whack me with a trout.

Cynicism
5 Ps: Persistent POV Pushing Prevails over Policy.

Pigs and sausage: This user understands that making sausage sometimes involves wrestling with pigs. But he doesn't have to like it.

WikiBear
A WikiBear is a large omnivorous browser. It feeds mostly on the berries of short edits, which can nevertheless add up to a fat edit count. Sometimes it tackles larger prey, rewriting entire articles. Before tackling larger prey, the WikiBear often spends a long time stalking the article (and sometimes the involved editors) and preparing its attack. When surprised by overly aggressive or asinine actions by editors who should know better, the WikiBear may take a swipe, but would rather be off munching berries. WikiBears eat up trouts. The WikiBear spends a good part of its life in hibernation, sometimes to conserve energy through a long winter, but often for the sheer pleasure of taking a good nap. While sleeping it digests the knowledge gained from browsing. It emerges from hibernation with a voracious appetite to learn more, or sometimes it just wakes up cranky.