User:Winter-PSU/Inequality in post-apartheid South Africa/AverageEccentric Peer Review

General info
Winter-PSU
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing:User:Winter-PSU/Inequality in post-apartheid South Africa
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):What a great idea to analyze the impact of Covid-19 on inequality in South Africa! You have also selected a lot of high quality sources. :When you edit your draft, your hard work on collecting statistics may shine better with some intensive grammar checking and simplification of sentence structure.  In some cases the sentences start out saying one thing and inadvertently say something different by the end, I think because the sentence is overly long and complex or has lots of opposing ideas in it.:I'm not quite following the connection between COVID-19 discrepancies and apartheid.  You mention the way COVID-19 disproportionately impacted "poor" communities but the main idea, as I understand it, is supposed to be about a racial divide rather than a socioeconomic divide.  There's some risk here of implying that Black=poor, which is likely not entirely accurate and risks enforcing harmful stereotypes.  I'd also suggest being very careful about using the term "poor", which is nonspecific and is often considered disrespectful.  "Class" also means a very specific thing which might not have a place in this article.  :Since you did a lot of research and writing, something that may help is to pull out comparisons between South Africa and Western nations, since apartheid is internal to South Africa.  Alternately, it'd be helpful to the average reader to more plainly spell out the role Western nations play in South Africa's internal workings.  :I really look forward to reading the final draft of this!  It's a complex idea to work with, and so interesting.

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)