User:XavierHen12/User:Yasmin Adolfo/Bisj pole/XavierHen12 Peer Review

General info
Yasmin Adolfo
 * Whose work are you reviewing?


 * Link to draft you're reviewing:User:Yasmin Adolfo/Bisj pole
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists):Bisj pole

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

Beginning with the lead, it has a strong opening sentence that immediately tells me what a Bisj Pole is and where its creation is practiced. The rest of the lead gives me a good overview of what is discussed later in the article such as the purpose for its creation and the rituals and practices it is associated with. There is no information that is not discussed later in the article. However, it seems a bit too detailed for a lead but this can be resolved by removing the part that starts with "After the feast..." since it seems like information that is unnecessary so early on in the article.

For the content of the text, all of the information that has been added is relevant to the topic and up to date. There does not seem to be anything that is missing or out of place. It does address Wikipedia's equity gaps since it is discussing a historically underrepresented people the Asmat People.

For the Tone and Balance of the text, all of the content seems to be neutral and none of the claims made within the article seem to be heavily biased for any particular position. There do not seem to be any perspectives that are underrepresented or overrepresented. It does not seem like it is trying to persuade the reader towards one position over another instead it seems to be solely focused on conveying the facts.

For the sources and references of the text, most of the sources are secondary except for the Encyclopedia Brittanica which is a tertiary source, I do not know if that is an issue or not but it is probably best to mention it. What they have written is reflective of their sources, however, there is still more information in the sources that could be put into there article. They do have a good set of sources but there is still a lot of academic texts both book and articles to pull from instead of almost solely relying on websites. All of the sources are current and their links work. They seem to have pulled from a good range of authors but as stated earlier there are more that they could pull from.

For the organization of the article, all of the content is written in a clear and concise way that allows the reader to read it without difficulty. It does not have any spelling or grammar mistakes. All of the content is well organized into sections but the "After the feast..." part should be moved down to the purpose section.

For the Images, they did not include any images.

The overall impression of their additions to the article is that they have greatly expanded upon the existing article making it much more informative and complete with a few required adjustments. The strength of the added content is that it provides necessary information that was lacking from the original article. The content can be improved by pulling from more academic sources such as books or articles and moving some information around into different sections.