User:Xfismajig

Xfismajig (technically "xfismajig") is the common username for American poet Miles Pearson, born in a year that does not warrant him the privileges of publishing his work. His ego floats in a golden mean between shunning from sharing his creative efforts and creating a legitimate Wikipedia page for his own human self. Alas, my user page.

"Pearled Confinement"; August 2018
Pearled confinement

The walls are covered in script

Each one the same as the last

It’s getting tighter

But now there’s twice as much space

In the worst way possible

My dollop left marks

Thankfully the walls are absorbent

If it’s so airtight

Where are these fish coming from?

If it’s so airtight

Why is it draining?

I can see through the wet paper

There are only other boxes

I can’t bring myself to raise my voice

So I only whisper to the fish

I try and calm them

For the droplets keep coming

I notice my reflection after studying the moss

I see cracked marble

Each streak hazily spelling out words

In a language I cannot understand

My face is frozen

I hope the fish aren’t too cold

"Dearest"; August 2018
A waltz wherein both parties are gelatinous, slowly distancing themselves, stretching their appendages infinitely

The clatter of a train station yet only seeing the pink and white blotches above and around you

Watching dry paint dry

Blinking yet retaining vision

An analog tape wherein Schoenberg slowly fades to the listener, talking to the listener about their day

The scent of yogurt and yogurt, forever intertwining to create life

Pizzicato laughter

Legato machinery

Bonnets enveloping a knot of nervous limbs

The deaf only hearing quiet rubbing noises

Drift

Child

"Untitled"; July 2018
i remember it all, i remember it all. i fell into a fit of materialism. escapism via fabrics. oversleeping until i cant sleep. masochism. i cross streets with my eyes closed. cannot accept love from my family. everyone fades away. a wave of it. oblivion. a libido too high, and pockets too deep. ticks. fatigue. overwhelming fatigue. care without patience. paranoia. everyone is fading away. or perhaps i have faded away. i have stayed in a locked room for weeks, hardly ever exiting. consistency. mental inconsistencies. reaching to touch her but there is nothing there. there is nothing there. if i do not exist, where do i go? please and thank you. social isolation. a pre-mortem without the extra steps. will i be alright? all will feel fine. am i all? is all me? is this all i am? my confidence came with detachment. its easier to love yourself when you don't feel like yourself. i feel split. yes, movie, yes, mentally. i hope i can keep feeling. home, emoh, nonsense, a man does not need such. a man does not have such a home. a man only has nonsense; this shell i inhabit. if i jump; let me fall. fall. autumn. season of death, despite having polarity with spring, it is still a sweet, dusty death. summer is a damp and hazy death. winter is a tense, true death. spring is peak death. spring replaces humans with plants. plant. vegetable. i am vegetative. yes. lost interest. i was never taught how to use my head. scrolling through the facebook pages of the deceased. gathering images. everything is colors and shapes, beyond weight yet unaffected by gravity. fixed in their positions to give the illusion of gravity. the illusion. me. i feel as if my physical form could be blended together akin to paint. paint, a medium i have far from mastered. paint, a medium of gogh. gogh: tragedy. take out yourself, explore the walls of your shell. if you have a shell... i seem to be the most hermited of the bunch. the bunch. sulfuric. methamphetamines. big word avoid point. small word simpler. can i act upon what is necessary? can i act upon anything? is my forte everything unnecessary? i live within my eyelids. ave maria.

"Untitled: Reprise"; August 2018
I remember it all. NOTHING is kaleidoscopic. everything is focused and real and pure but NOT in the sense that it hasn't been tainted. it is tainted because I am in this box. I am in this glass box in this room. only I have motion because I am the disruption. I cannot hear anything because the foam surrounding my exits is soundproof. they are exits because they throb with the "heartbeat" of some internal bag of fluid or another internal pouch of habit. I am a wheel in a field of dry grass, and long leaky metal pipes flowing with... I am in an obsolete gearbox. I am the epitome of a prayer. Feels like a wheel. I close my eyes and see a slate-grey abyss. Then the pillars come. The pillars, jagged from MY focus, rise and disappear into the identical abyss above. I am a .onion link. Don't click on me. Do not click on me.

"Foreshadowing"; June 2018
"Dearest Dord, O Forboden, Au Revoir.""Why me? Ears lick what they cannot hear.""O Distinct, art thou beknownst? Beknownst of thee.""Your hair, curdling yogurt, the honey of me.""My Moon, O Dollop, Hear Ye.""Why me? Teeth are stronger than bone.""Thy Moiety, My Phlegm, Greet Thee.""One mustn’t usurp what is not a throne.""Chew Nail. Drink Blood. Déjà Vu."

"Unfinished"; July 2018
"My own tendrils suffocate me upon this balloon, this journey, above the clouds.""I can only admire their effort, being the slackjawed sailor.""Is it merely a wireframe mountain? Or is it the polygraphs I dream of?"

"hh"; September 2018
carved quirkiness. unique. not like them. like them. hypo, hypo, hypo, h7C1B1Bmutilation, mutilating, mutilate. take it, hold it, cradle it with YOUR CORE your core your core.

right, well, yeah, so,

syringes and whathaveyou. jarl mirror i. a burning bush south of a shark head.

grey meat. raw meat. a junction most notable! 5F405F

''you know? and so I say''

i am a secret drink. watch me burst. watch me. if i had cameras in my room i would be on sulpiride. if my computer was keylogged i’d be arrested for obscenity. i’m curious about s211A15 God. god. God.

and then she says

i just wanted to talk to you you

but you’re not there

and its out of your control

and i get it

and i cant do anything abt it

and i may sound ignorant

but im sorry

''right? so then i’m all like'' WIP