User:Xiuyuan44/sandbox

Welcome to your sandbox!

Link to Project Resource Page
Project Homepage and Resources

Practice Editing Here (Nov 23rd in-class Wiki session work)
Concussion
 * This is a place to practice clicking the "edit" button and practice adding references (via the citation button).

Assignment # 3

 * Note: You will be emailing your assignment # 3 directly to your tutor, however, please paste a version here that excludes your personal information. This will allow us to support your efforts on Wikipedia prior to editing "live" in the article.

Wikipedia Assignment 3

Proposed Changes

Create new subheading section in ‘Epidemiology’ called “Workplace”.

Concussions may also be common and occur in the workplace. According to the US Bureau of Labour Statistics, the most common causes of mTBI-related hospitalizations and deaths from the workplace are falls, force of heavy objects, and vehicular collisions (1). As a consequence, jobs in the construction, transportation, and natural resource industries (eg. agriculture, fishing, mining) have more elevated mTBI incidence rates ranging from 10-20 cases per 100 000 workers (1). In particular, as vehicular collisions are the leading cause of workplace mTBI-related injuries, workers from the transportation sector often carry the most risk (2). Despite these findings, there still remain important gaps in data compilation on workplace-related mTBIs, which has raised questions about increased concussion surveillance and preventative measures in private industry (2).

Rationale for Proposed Changes

The reason why we have decided to include this new section is that while the Epidemiology section covers the risk factors of Age and Sports, there is lack of information regarding the risks in workplaces, an area of prevalence for head trauma. Therefore, the first three sentences of this new section serve to provide examples and statistics of some of the most at-risk professions. With this information obtained from the US Bureau of Labour Statistics (1), we hope to inform the general public who may work in these sectors of these risks to safety and to take appropriate precautions. The last two sentences of this section focus on specifying the sector most at-risk, once again to re-emphasize the concussion dangers with certain jobs. Additionally, the last sentence also brings to light the need for added injury reporting and safety measures in specific industries, which is a pressing issue today that could influence safety protocols. This information obtained from CDC report on traumatic brain injury (2) will hopefully highlight gaps in the data for traumatic brain injury incidence in the workplace. Overall, by introducing this section, we hope to increase public awareness of workplace risks for concussion.

Critique of Sources

Overall, I think the two sources I have chosen are of high value as they are both recent, secondary sources. Furthermore, they are governmental reports and statistics whose agenda was to present factual information not opinions, which lend them credibility and an unbiased perspective. However, with these sources, there is the issue that because these organizations are American, the reported epidemiological statistics may be biased towards American populations. To address this issue, I looked at findings from other countries in Europe, Canada, etc. as well, who reported fairly similar trends in most at-risk professions for concussion. Therefore, I was able to confidently use these two sources despite this potential for bias.

Sources:

1.     U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics. Nonfatal cases involving days away from work: Selected characteristics. (2003–2010). Retrieved December 1, 2020, from

http://data.bls.gov/cgi-bin/dsrv?ch.

2.     Report to Congress on Traumatic Brain Injury Epidemiology and Rehabilitation. (2016, January 22). Retrieved November 16, 2020, from https://www.cdc.gov/traumaticbraininjury/pubs/congress_epi_rehab.html

What to post on the talk page?

 * This will also be covered on Nov 23rd in class. Your group should use the below template to share an outline of your proposed improvements (including your new wording and citations). Article talk pages are not places to share your assignment answers. The Wikipedia community will be more interested in viewing your exact article improvement suggestions including where you plan to improve the article (which section), what wording you suggest, and the exact citation (Note: all citations must meet WP:MEDRS)
 * You will not be able to paste citations directly from your sandbox to talk pages (unless you are interested in editing/learning Wiki-code in the "source editing" mode). We suggest re-adding your citations on the talk page manually (using the cite button and populating the citation by pasting in the DOI, website, or PMID). You will have to repeat this process yet again when you edit the actual article live.
 * Talk Page Template: CARL Medical Editing Initiative/Fall 2020/Talk Page Template