User:YBNBookworm/2022 Chilean national plebiscite/Tjagmax Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

Sydbakal


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * 2022 Chilean national plebiscite
 * 2022 Chilean national plebiscite

Evaluate the drafted changes
• Good topic sentences

• Good citations

• Consider adding some hyperlinks

• First sentence of second paragraph seems a little strong. "Doubts about the representativeness of the Constitutional Convention's members and fears about the negative impacts of the new constitution led to its rejection." Some suggestions: Change this to "Doubts about the representativeness of the Constitutional Convention's members may have contributed to its rejection." Move the second sentence of p2 to the end of the paragraph 1. Now, all your statistics about negative effects are in the same (1st) paragraph, and all your stats about representation are more tightly together.

• Paragraph three could potentially use some elaboration (either on what these elements are or why people opposed them, maybe embedded quote from source would be useful)