User:YapMel/Dr. Leticia E. Afuang/Nounonymous Peer Review

General info

 * Whose work are you reviewing?

YapMel


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * User:YapMel/Dr. Leticia E. Afuang


 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)

Evaluate the drafted changes
(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)

Lead
You can link "Filipina" in the first sentence to the Philippines Wikipedia page.

I would take out the comma before "currently working as..."

The comma after "Snake Lady" should be right before the end quotation mark (so "Snake Lady," not "Snake Lady",)

I would change the "Also" in "Also an advocate for environmental sustainability..." to "As," since "Also" changes/confuses the meaning of the clause.

Content
The first word of section titles (e.g., Early life & education, Research & publications) is the only word that is capitalized (unless there is proper noun later on in the title).

The tense of the first sentence in the Early Life & Education ("Growing up on a farm in the province of Isabela, Afuang had always been fond of animals.") is inconsistent with that of the rest of the section. I would suggest changing it to something like "Having grown up on a farm in the province of Isabela, Afuang was fond of animals from a young age."

"Biology" in the last sentence of the Teaching subsection should not be capitalized.

Tone and Balance
The tone of the first sentence of the Retirement section might be too "nonfactual" for Wikipedia (I would suggest rephrasing "thoughts of" and "notes that" to make it more Wikipedian/formal).