User:Yllenerad/Autoimmune disease in women/JackGradyP1 Peer Review

General info

 * Yllenerad


 * Link to draft you're reviewing
 * https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Yllenerad/Autoimmune_disease_in_women?veaction=edit&preload=Template%3ADashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Autoimmune disease in women
 * Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
 * Autoimmune disease in women
 * Autoimmune disease in women

Evaluate the drafted changes
The article draft's lead section is very well done. It clearly lays out the rest of the article and uses some nice examples. I liked how certain terms were explained simply to introduce an idea. If I were to give any criticism (and it is only a small one that applies to the second section of the article body), the way it is written is just a bit overly precise and scientific. The information is good, but it was a little hard to follow. As a whole it is a very good article, especially the second half of the lead section. The content is neutral and well-balanced; the information is just presented and there are no opinions or sides taken anywhere. The non pharmacological treatment and the complementary treatment sections of the article's body were a great way to end the article.